Enough is enough
by MrsMailJeevas
Summary: After a blow out with Mello an emotional Matt packs his belongings and leaves. After a night drinking at the bar he ends up spending an eventful night with a man. Can he find love with his new lover? Or will he go back to Mello?
1. Walking out the door

[I do not own Death note or any of it's Characters....or something like that.]

Walking out the door

Matt had it, this would be the last time he allowed the blond to speak to him like that. Mello didn't realize how bad the words hurt, how horrible the pain was, how deeply they cut. The others venomous tongue had ripped into him once again shooting snappy comment after snappy comment until he finally snapped. It didn't matter how many times he warned the blond that his words were painful when he grew angry more words came, louder words more insistent words. They were always directed towards Matt and they always ended with Mello claiming to leave him and no one would want a antisocial gamer anyway. But not this time, this time would be the time that Matt would leave Mello and show him he could function just fine alone. He worked fine when Mello left him he could work fine now also even after all these years.

He searched around the reasonably sized closet until he found a suitcase stuffing a few clothing articles into it ignoring the blond who was now watching him with a smirk from the door. He was mocking him and he knew it. Ever since Mello was nearly killed by Takada he had been a nervous wreak worrying about the man that didn't give a damn about him. He breathed in deeply fighting back tears as he zipped the suitcase up attempting to show the other that he was serious this time. There had been plenty of times he threatened but Mello had never taken him seriously the snear on his tanned face was enough to show that. He didn't think that Matt could leave him because Matt belonged to him. He refused. Not this time, he couldn't take any more of this abuse from the man he had formerly loved. He wasn't sure when the fire of his love for Mello was patted out but it no longer existed.

"Aw, Matty I'm sorry." Mello finally said strolling over gently wrapping his arms around the red heads frame. "You want sex? Right?" He asked softly blowing into the mans ear as he jerked away from the blond falling back on the bed emerald eyes wide in fear. Mello sighed walking forward and laying beside the man. "Come'er beautiful, I'm sorry. Did I hurt you again? Would you like to cry this time?" He asked gently running his fingers over the mans face slowly curving around his cherry coloured lips before leaning forward and kissing them. It started off gentle before gaining possession, Mello smashing his lips against the other bruising them as he snaked his tongue into the others mouth. He sat back panting slightly noticing the look in Matt's eyes. "There's my Matty. My beautiful Matty you're such a whore." He smirked.

Matt allowed the other to search his mouth faintly feeling hands running over his frame as he groaned softly. When the blond pulled back he licked over his bluing lips, Mello was always so rough with him but he didn't mind as much anymore. Actually it was more of a turn on but being called a whore brought the pain back. He shoved the other away grabbing the suitcase that was sitting by the pillows where Mello had pushed it. The man wouldn't silence him with kisses and touches this time he didn't deserve this. If Mello wouldn't love him the way he was supposed to then he would surely find someone else. That or he didn't need anyone at all. He could function just fine living alone in an apartment at least he thought he still could.

Mello frowned watching the red head get off the bed moving towards the door lugging the suitcase with him. He rolled his eyes throwing the keys up in the air and snatching them before they fell. He planned on keeping them until the other was over with his episode and back in his arms. The night would most likely end with some nice kinky sex, handcuffs, biting, pulling of hair. He didn't think Matt realized how much he really enjoyed sadistic sex. He sighed walking after the red head watching him fumble around for his keys. It was entertaining when the boy acted this way as if he were going to leave, Matt wouldn't walk out that door and leave him here. He just wouldn't. It didn't happen before and it wouldn't happen now.

"Matty don't do this." He said softly walking towards the door again as the boy glared in his direction. His hands flew up as he stopped there stepping back. "Woah Matty, I can see that you're really mad this time. What do you want me to do say that I'm sorry?" He raised an eyebrow searching the others face to see if that's what he wanted but he didn't find it. "Beautiful, my love, darling, come here." He opened his arms for the other as Matt shook his head again firmly his eyes darker than usual. Mello frowned, this was a first Matt was refusing to listen to him. Matt was refusing a hug from him. Matt was just refusing him all together. He breathed in deeply taking another step forward, "Matty. I'm sorry you know I didn't mean it. I'll buy you a new game. Will that make you happy?"

He shook his head, "Give me my keys. That will make me happy." He nearly yelled at the other managing to keep his voice down for the neighbors. He was tired of this all of it. He was tired of Mello. "I know you took them. I may be an emotional wreak but it's your doing and I can still think you sick fuck." He was shaking fearfully. If Mello went into a rage he might not make it out this time. He nearly didn't make it out last time but the blond apologized took anger management and passed. He had passed. "Hand them over Mello. I want to leave."

He frowned holding the keys up. "Why should I give you the keys? So you can go running off and spend the night in your car? Then I'll have to wait until tomorrow afternoon and then you'll come knocking on the door apologizing for running out on me and promise that you won't do it again and that you overreacted. I already know what you're going to do. Let's save the drama and skip to the sex." He said simply growing tired of this half-assed bullshit. "Come on Matt I'll even be gentle with you tonight."

Matt's head dropped. Mello was fucking with him now like it was all a joke but he wasn't going to allow him to get to him this time. This time would be different he would get out of his grasp. "Mello. Give me the fucking keys." He said again as the rolled his eyes sighing.

He nodded, "You want the keys?" He threw them hitting the red head squarely in the chest. "Get out Matt. Don't come back. Don't call. Don't text I don't want to hear that you're sorry. We're over. You understand me?" He yelled as Matt headed out the door with the suitcase towards the lift.

He was fine with it. They had been done for about a year now and he knew Mello knew it. He entered the lift watching the door slam behind him. He would never come back here. He'd find someone that would care for him...someone that would love him.

[This had been on my mind for a while to do. I can't wait to show you who Matt is going to end up getting with and how things work out for both Matt and Mello! Please review and I'll type the other chapters up! Thank you for reading! ]


	2. One night could last a lifetime

[I don't own Death note or any of it's Characters...or something like that.]  
****Authors note: There is a lemon in this chapter. Yes, if you don't know what a lemon is...well you're screwed.

One night could last a lifetime

Matt drove for what seemed like hours through the town. It was in the middle of the night and he didn't want to check into a hotel where Mello could easily just call around and locate him. He'd have to wait for a while or find something else to do. He sighed parking in a convenience stores parking lot stepping out of the car smoking his last cigarette in the pack before laying his head against the car. He sighed softly the events running back to him again of just hours ago. He had left Mello. The man who had once been the love of his life. The man that for so long he believed could do no wrong. He had left him alone in what used to be the apartment they shared together but he wouldn't go back there ever again. He'd had to be taken back kicking and screaming.

He straightened up shutting his car door before pulling his goggles off his eyes. Not even the sunny hue of orangy-yellow could brighten his mood as his emerald gaze drifted to a bar sitting across the street. For once it didn't seem as if smoking would solve any of his problems so he made his way across the street to the damp looking club. It was the type of place found at the edge of town sitting precariously close to town lines to greet and send off patrons of the city in the distance.

Matt took a seat at the bar his head instantly falling down into his hands as he wondered how he had sunken so low. He felt bad for leaving Mello, unreasonably horrible though he believed that to be nothing more than the abused spouse syndrome he was going through. He ordered a drink drowning it as soon as it was set before him he only wished he could drown his thoughts at this moment. There were a few people at the bar with him, a few girls looking his way but he wasn't interested in bleach blonds and then there was a dark haired man who was staring into space as he twisted a bit in the chair. Matt turned away from the other drowning his fourth drink of the night his mind turning a bit fuzzy when there was a tap on his shoulder. He turned to see the dark haired man staring at him questioning.

"Yeah?" He replied rolling his eyes away from the other as he smiled sheepishly. "What do you want?"

The man held his hands up in surrender just as Mello had did before. "I was just thinking that you look a bit different than everyone else." He said softly his eyes flashing around the club as if he were nervous. "I-I don't mean anything strange by it you just look really upset. Is there something wrong?" He seemed to be legitimately worried about the red head as he leaned forward to hear what the other said over the pulsing music and cheering from the dance floor behind him.

Matt laughed humorlessly, "I just broke up with my boyfriend." He replied downing yet another drink as the dark haired man blushed a bit. He could tell that other wouldn't have possibly thought that he was a raging homo. He never really viewed himself a raging, Mello was raging enough for the both of them. Anytime he went out with the other they were just assumed to be together and the conclusion was correct they were together back then. "Don't look like that it's best that you already know I mean I'd hate to rub off on you." He snickered the drinks had given him a merry buzz the fight with the blond seeming like years ago. Now that he was post drama he noticed the dark haired man looked a bit innocent, cutesy, adorable in a sense as he smiled running his eyes over the others suit. He wasn't a Mello but he was attractive.

The man smiled shrugging, "Well I don't think that can happen." He grinned slightly taking a drink from the bartender that was eyeing the two of them curiously. "So, if you just broke up with him why are you in the club? I'd think that you would still be upset." He raised an eyebrow suspiciously waving for another drink that the man behind the counter quickly supplied.

Matt shrugged, "I'm drunk it has a numbing effect on me." He called over the music. It wasn't his type of music but then again right about now he's give just about anything to hear a Mario tune. He strained to think back through the fight blacking out everything he didn't want to think about. He'd left his game sitting on the table. Figures he didn't bring it with him when he most desperately needed it. "I don't have a place to live, I'm drunk, I need a damn cigarette..." He laid his head down before felling a tugging. He looked to the dark haired man.

He smiled, "There's a store across the street my house isn't too far away." He stood watching Matt with the same soft dark brown gaze as the red head nodded. He stood shakily quickly being grabbed by the other who helped him forward. He laughed to himself. He was in a club that he couldn't remember the name of accepting the help of a stranger after breaking it off with Mello. He couldn't sink lower than this as he leaned against the man pointing towards his car as the dark haired one nodded leading him forward.

When Matt was situated the other headed inside to buy him a pack of smokes. He couldn't help but think that the other was a bit too kind almost in a naïve kind of way. He thanked him greatly when he returned as the red head quickly lit up blowing the smoke out watching the dark haired man. "What?"

He shrugged, "Where are you going to spend the night. It's barely even midnight and you've been drinking." He added at the end as if it were going to change anything. "Maybe you should get a hotel room?" He offered as the red head shook his head. Mello would find him there, the blond was going to be pissed after contemplating their fight for a few hours. "You can spend the night in my apartment." He said quickly, "I live right around the corner, as long as you're not out here alone sleeping in your car or something you can spend the night there with me. You'd be in a lot of danger here."

Matt rolled his eyes as the other helped him out of the drivers seat. "Okay, Okay." He laid back watching the dark haired man start the car though he wasn't sure how drunk he was to be agreeing to go home with a complete stranger. The dark haired man seemed to be too innocent to hurt him though, Matt could see a lot in that goofy smile he kept gracing him with.

They pulled up to a nice apartment as the dark haired man helped it out of the car but the red head insisted on walking by himself. He wondered what the other did to be able to afford something so nice. Mello and his apartment was paid by and insured by the mafia and it's associates the thought sicked him. This man paid for his belongings with an honest days work.

He sat the red head down on the couch disappearing into the kitchen after saying something about water for him. The gamers eyes drifted around the apartment plainly decorated he could tell it belonged to a man. The couch was black sitting adjacent to the television between both of those a coffee table. It was surprisingly empty, no pictures in the walls just oddly placed paintings. He frowned it was as if the dark haired man had to remove the things he cared for.

He jumped as the other returned thrusting the glass of cool water into his hand before dropping onto the loveseat beside the red head. He took a drink before leaning forward setting the sweating glass onto the coffee table as his eyes drifted to the other man who was removing his tie to the suit. He sat back watching the other fumble around until it bothered him as he reached forward easily untying the tie and tossing it across the the room where it landed by the fire place. The other man seemed a bit stunned as Matt watched him with his eyes lidded.

He laughed nervously looking back at Matt as the red head raised an eyebrow. The other leaned forward placing his lips to Matt's as the red head sunk into it. He couldn't help himself after so much drama hours before it felt nice to be gently touched by someone. The dark haired man was gentle enough laying him back slowly on the couch as the kissing intensified sending sensations to Matt's sex. The red head fumbling madly with the others shirt popping off the buttons one by one.

The dark haired man had slipped Matt's shoes off, running his fingers up the stripped shirt caressing at the gentle pale skin.  
He moved a bit closer, so that one knee was on either side of Matt's waist. He leaned closer, tracing along the middle of the boy's chest with his tongue, his thumbs caressing and teasing Matt's nipples as the red head groaned his head falling to the side as he was pulled around again into a reclined position. The others hand hooked around Matt's leg, hitching it around his waist. Here, his own desire was evident, pressing against Matt's thigh.

The man ground his hips against Matt, his pants beginning to feel a bit too tight. His hands worked the waistline of Matt's pants, working those off as well. He wanted to see more of that smooth skin of his.

Matt arched against the other barely focused enough to watch his skilled hands declothing him. He was painfully hard rocking against the other to create enough friction for them both to enjoy as he finally achieved taking the shirt off. That wasn't enough but he ran his fingers across the others bare chest taking the time to bring the man down for another kiss. He felt the other working on his own pants now sagging them down as he unceremoniously removed Matt's boxers dropping them somewhere close.

It was only a matter of seconds before the man pressed into him dryly. Matt groaned the sensation familiar but still painful as the other remained still waiting for Matt to adjust. The red head nodded reaching up and bracing himself on the couch feeling the dark haired man work himself up to a decent speed leaning forward to connect lips again. The man searched his mouth diligently, twinging their tongues together in the heat of passion a sheet of sweat coating them both as the kiss ended quickly becoming substituted with groans of ecstasy.

Matt clawed his back hooking a leg around him begging for more as the other supplied until he was nearly at his wits end. It was passionate and deep even though he didn't know the other but there was something there that throughout their relationship Mello had never attempted to make. A connection. It was strong as Matt felt his member grasp his breath catching when he felt the other beginning to attempt to finish him. He clawed the couch his head falling back tittering on the edge of the pleasure induced mountain before he groaned arching against the other a final time he jumping into the release.

Ten minutes later Matt still sat panting against the dark haired mans chest as he kissed around the others neck gently. The man smiled gently petting his hair though he still seemed to be a bit confused on how they ended up sleeping together. In all truth he wasn't sure how it happened either but it didn't matter anymore. This had been one of the most bittersweet nights of his life as he heard vibration coming from under the other.

The man shifted as Matt pulled his cellphone from under the other. He blinked sleepily reading the name, 'Mel' as the other frowned. "Boyfriend?" He asked softly.

Matt shook his head tossing the phone to the other couch laying back down. "Ex." He replied simply closing his eyes for some much needed rest. He would assess this more in the morning but right now all he wanted was sleep. "One last thing." He heard a soft half sleep grunt. "What's your name?" He felt a bit stupid.

He laughed gently, "Matsuda. Touta Matsuda."

"Matt."

Matsuda smiled, "It's a pleasure to make you acquaintance." They both laughed gently until it faded until the depths of sleep.

[Ah, yes this was the lemon. I'm made of serious fail I already know but I'd like to know what you think. Please review this chapter and also did you get the twist before it happened? Not much to say. Review and I'll update.]


	3. A new morning

[I don't own Death note or any of it's Characters...or something like that.]  
****Authors note: Thanks for all the reviews! OMG I LOVE YOU GUYS KEEP IT UP! The more you review the faster I update you know me I'm an attention whore. I had someone ask why Matsuda. Well frankly I thought it would be a good thing for Matty who needs to get back on his feet. Matsuda who represents freedom and innocence and then Mello who is entrapment and temptation. I mean it should be explained more later in the chapters but when you review and tell me to update I will. That's with any of my fanfictions. I'll be looking for about 4 reviews on this chapter before I update again. I decided to bade my updates on you guys. Anyway enjoy the chapter and review!

A new morning

Matt rolled over feeling around beside the bed whining. There was something wrong with this situation, deeply wrong with this. Firstly there was no bedside table to house his addiction and frankly that pissed him off. Next was the arm around his waist as he turned over looking into the face of the man from the night before even sleeping he looked innocent and sweet. He remembered he said his name was Matsuda. Touta Matsuda. He smiled thinking about the name for a few seconds before trying to sit up and move the hand from around his waist as it tightened. He didn't mind laying back again the feeling of someone wanting to be near him like this was overwhelming it almost made him feel like crying. Almost.

The other man opened his eyes almost instantly after Matt had laid back down. "Your boyfriend kept calling so I left your cellphone in the living room so it wouldn't wake you." He said gently pulling his arm back scratching his head sheepishly as his eyes rolled over Matt's petite frame. He didn't say anything other than that pointing to the door as if waiting for the other to go find it. Instead the red head seemed to be looking for something else, "Cigarettes are in the same place." He frowned watching as the red head nearly jumped out of bed. He sighed, the other must be a chronic smoker or something.

Matt was planning on flipping the whole living room for his smokes but instead found them laying on the coffee table neatly in the right corner where the two corners met. He picked them up eyeing his cellphone for a few seconds before his curiosity got the best of him. He had been missing from Mello's sight for nearly fourteen hours unless his internal clock was way off but he guessed it was. It looked like the sun was about to set again, way more than fourteen hours he guessed.

The red head took a seat at the end of the love seat hearing Matsuda moving around in his bedroom. He guessed waking up beside a stranger after a one night stand would be awkward but oddly enough he felt right at home here with Matsuda. Maybe it was the impending feeling that the man would protect him from the raging storm that was surely coming his name. Hurricane Mello was just building up to a category five and when he came it was going to be devastating. He flipped through his cellphone finding several text messages, the beginning few were mocking, 'Matty do you really think you can leave me? See you in a few hours.' Afterwards they seemed to escalate to annoyance, 'Where are you Matt?' and finally the threats, 'I'll seriously end this if you don't bring your arse back home. Now.' That was sent only a few hours ago.

He smirked triumphantly turning his head to see Matsuda coming down the hallway, the dark haired mans head turned downward slightly as if he didn't want to make eye contact. "Regretting last night?" He offered putting the phone to his ear to listen to his messages. A few from days ago but his eyes widened when he heard Mello's annoyed tone, "Matt," the blond said, "I'm not going to spend time tracking down a mutt like you. You be home when I get back or else." He was frightened to think about what the or else could possibly be. "Fuck."

Matsuda blushed at the mention of the night before. He wouldn't say that he regretting it though at first he thought it was only the alcohol and lack of female companionship that had made the red head so attractive the night before but right now completely sober he found him simply stunning. The mans green eyes, red hair, pale body, petite frame, he remembered the previous night so vividly he didn't think he could ever regret it. "What's wrong?" He asked gently watching as the red head slowly lowered his cellphone laying it on his lap. "Matt?" He felt odd calling his name but he pushed it out of his mind. "Matt?"

The red heads head jerked to meet the others eyes, "I-I have to go." He said quickly moving to stand as Matsuda gently pushed him back down. "I have to go." He said again noticing the look on the other mans face. "Why the hell are you looking at me like that?" He questioned watching the others dark gaze, he began to blush under it. "What?"

Matsuda reached forward tracing a black bruise on the red heads shoulder and one on his back also. They were old bruises from a few days ago but he could tell they looked bad on his pale form. He must have looked like a bruised and beaten doll to Matsuda whoms face said it all. The other man frowned before pulling his hands back, Matsuda wasn't going to allow him to leave.

"He did this to you?" He asked softly as Matt nodded slowly. "Why?"

Matt shrugged, "My boyfriends into some sick S&M. It feels good at the time." He offered but Matsuda wasn't buying it. He rolled his eyes away from the other. He wasn't sure why it was easier to talk down to people like Matsuda but the other man didn't seem to be noticing. It was definitely the innocence that he held on him, not even the night before seemed to have corrupted him enough.

"Ex boyfriend." Matsuda corrected smiling as Matt blinked.

"Right, what you said. My ex boyfriend was into some sick S&M." He repeated again looking at Matsuda. "I still have to get out of here." He mumbled looking at his hands sluming a bit to hide some of the bruises and cuts all over his body.

He sighed, "Give yourself some time to recover and then I'll let you run free of here, okay?" He offered as Matt nodded knowing that his time was limited still. "I'll make.." He looked back at the clock, "Dinner and put you back to bed or you can watch television or something-" He paused as there was a loud knock on the door. He raised an eyebrow giving Matt a slight smile before heading towards the locked door.

The dark haired man asked whom it was several times without an answer. He frowned opening the door and stepping outside shutting it behind him. Matt lit up his cigarette frowning slightly his mind running through the things that Mello could possibly be thinking about doing to him this time as the door opened and his name was called. He looked at Matsuda, "Eh?"

"Someone named Mello wants to speak with you."

[Ah and I leave it here because I'm evil. Review and you'll have the wonderful confrontation of Matt, Mello and Matsuda. Review guys! You're doing so good this story is more popular than agent 003 review wise.]  
Also check out the poll on my profile page and vote!


	4. Liar, Liar

[I don't own Death note or any of it's characters...or something like that...]

Authors note: Okay, I'm totally in love with you guys! I've been out an about recently so I haven't been able to update. This time I'm working for 6 new reviews! So if you're looking for a quick update I need you guys to review and also take my poll! That will help me see if I really need to update faster. Here's the deal. 5 reviews and there will be an update. When you're done reading all you have to say is great chap keep writing! And you'll get a new chapter. If all of you do it there should be no problem with getting a new update today. KK?! Kasy~

Liar, Liar

Matt paled visibly staring at Matsuda who still held that same dark look on his face. He shifted a bit on the couch before pushing himself up wishing that he would have gotten dressed before leaving the bedroom. He remembered seeing his clothes folded neatly for him on the chair in the corner but he had decided against them in the pursuit just to get his smokes. With the way it was looking those smokes would be the way he'd end up losing his life and he might even end up getting Matsuda killed in the process also. The last thing he needed was for the blond and dark haired man to compare notes but Mello was intelligent he was putting two and two together to make four before he was two.

Matsuda stepped out of the way as Matt peered around the corner seeing the blond standing against the wall waiting for him. The look on Mello's face said it all but it cleared up almost instantly as a soft smile spread on his lips and arms opened to hug the red head. Matt braced himself for the hug only to find it to be gentle and calm, "Matty I was worried sick about you last night. I didn't think that you would actually leave and stay gone. I'm glad that you didn't sleep in your car." He kissed the red head gently on the lips hearing Mastuda make a soft annoyed noise. "Thank you so much Matsuda-san for taking care of my Matty." He pet the boy softly in his arms.

Matt shivered slightly at the touch, a gentle touch from the blond didn't come often especially at a moment like this. He had spent the night with another man and they ended up sleeping together. Matt came to the door in boxers and Mello was hugging him like he was worried? Mello wasn't worried. Or was he?

"Mello how did you find me?" He breathed softly as Mello gently slid his fingers down pulling the cellphone out of his hands ad holding it up. He didn't have to say, Mello had a tracker in his cellphone. Mello wanted him to always come back so he tracked him. Mello had come to get him. Mello still loved him. "Oh." He said simply wrapping his arms around Mello's thin feline like frame as the man rocked him gently.

Though Matt didn't see it Mello was staring daggers into Matsuda. The look of triumphant annoyance at the man who had taken advantage of his lover while he was his weakest. The man did on the other hand keep the red head safe when most likely Matt couldn't but it still hurt that Matt had run off and slept with another man. It was a deep pulling feeling of remorse but he couldn't place why. The argument had been the same as all the others but he questioned if Matt was actually seeing there was a ray of light out there for him. That possibly other people would want him. He'd definitely have to put a stop to that.

"Matty go get dressed and let's go home." He kissed the man gently on the head but his voice was commanding enough for the red head to pull away and scurry back into the apartment. "You took advantage of him, stay away from him and I'll think about letting it go." He said seriously as Matsuda turned and headed back into the house ignoring the others words.

He hadn't taken advantage of Matt, no, the red head had come into his home yes, a bit drunk but he slept with him of his own free will. He traveled back to the bedroom finding Matt pulling on his shirt and looking around frantically for the rest of his belongings. "He's just going to beat you again Matt. Stay here with me and I can promise you help and safety." He said gently watching as the red head froze, "Matt, the relationship you have with him isn't safe. Matt. It's not safe for you to go back home with him."

Matt sighed, the man didn't know what he was talking about. Mello was the love of his life, the man that, for so long had been the only pillar for him to stand on. It didn't take a rocket scientist for someone to figure out that he'd go back to the blond man no matter how many times he was hurt. It pained him to see that look on Matsuda's face. That look kept telling him that he was wrong for running into the blonds arms after all these years. There was nothing unhealthy about their relationship if he stepped out of line Mello should try to push him back into it.

"It's not like that. Mello loves me I should have never left him in the first place." He mumbled slipping into his jeans. "There's nothing wrong with us- I-I just needed some time away from him but I see now that I was wrong." He smiled sheepishly reaching for the pack of cigarettes in Matsuda's hands as he pulled it back.

"You were wrong so he beats you? You're black and blue Matt. Okay, maybe I shouldn't talk like I understand the relationship between the two of you but I understand that it's not normal. You shouldn't be hit Matt. You don't deserve something like that. Stay here and I can protect you. I can make sure that no one will ever harm you again, please. I can't stand to sit here and think that he's hitting you. It's strange seeing as we just met but Matt, please."

He frowned snatching the cigarettes from the others hand, "And how an you say you're going to protect me from him?" He said seriously. "Or are those empty promises?"

"I'm a cop." Matsuda stated plain and simple. "Listen, I can't hold you here against your will but take my phone number. Keep it close and make sure he doesn't erase it." He smiled sadly, "I put it under Mello, ironic, huh?" He gave the red head a gentle squeeze. "If the time comes, I'll protect you from him just give me a ring." He looked a bit desperate but Matt ignored it. "Just call me daily or text so I'll know you're okay.

Matt nodded though he wasn't sure when he was going to need the phone number but as he took the phone back it knew that he might. "Thanks." He smiled gently heading down the hallway quickly not wanting to keep the blond waiting for too long.

He hit the landing looking at Mello who straightened a bit before a smile parted his lips. "Thank you again for keeping him." He said softly as if Matt were a pet but the red head ignored it bowing to Matsuda who nodded slowly waving them off. "Don't be a stranger." He said following Matt down the stairs.

It happened almost instantly when the blonds face fell into a dark sneer before he shoved the red head forward into the rail, blue eyes flashing. "Let's hurry and get home, dear." His voice sounded deepeningly threatening. "We have a lot to discuss."

****Anothers authors note: Ah! Another cliff hanger and if I get my five reviews YOU SHALL SEE inside Mello's and Matt's relationship and what happened to Matty that he had to leave Mello for a few months. . I'll out until I get my damn reviews. ilu guys. (^___^) Also there will be more Matsuda later on. You'll see.


	5. Love and pain

[I don't own Death note or any of it's Characters...or something like that.]  
****Authors note: Thank you so much guys! I never dreamed I'd have sixteen reviews! I would adore you more if you reviewed this chapter also. It's not as much as I'm threatening but this might be the last chapter for a while unless the next chapter is really in demand because I haven't updated any of my other fanfictions. So yeah that's about it. Thanks for reviewing and enjoy the chapter.  
****Warning this chapter contains violence and a lemon. I would hope you know what violence is as for the lemon...you're screwed again.

Love and pain

Matt kept his eyes on his rear view mirror for a majority of time unable to tear his eyes away from the blond on his bike. He wasn't sure why it surprised him any longer that Mello had lied to him about being happy he was okay. He felt like a child in trouble again at Wammy house except the punishments were less brutal. A night without dinner was nothing compared to the bruises he was about to receive from the blond. As small as Mello was he had wiry muscles stretching throughout his feline frame and when used they could pack quite the punch. He would know.

As much as he feared for himself he couldn't bring himself to call Matsuda. It wasn't as if he couldn't just bed the man to help him he just didn't want to admit that his relationship with Mello was finally over and had become the hazard that Matsuda had spoken of. Sure, Mello had pulled a gun on him a few times and he knew what he felt like to be pistol whipped but otherwise Mello had only shot at him once and it was because the blond was stressed out about the Kira case. He didn't blame the other though he wouldn't have even thought about doing something like maybe told the other to go away but Mello did what he believed was right for the moment.

Each time it happened, anything happened it was followed by the apologies. The late night sex, the touching, the love. All of it ha taken it's toll on Matt in the last few years to the point he had tittered at the end of a bloody mountain deciding if he should take his own life after being called worthless by the blond. He took the mans view so seriously because as Mello had said countless amounts of times, if he didn't want him then who will. He had sat there for hours while the blond was away on business with his PSP on his lap rocking with the razor blade in his hands. He could remember the thoughts that penetrated his mind for those hours before he finally worked his way up to slicing into his arms. He was fairly surprised how easy it was but not how much of the crimson liquid was penetrating through his shirt. No, that was the only welcomed part of the day it would have finally been over soon.

Matt didn't remember how long it took before Mello kicked the door in after being agitated that the red head hadn't answered his calls or come to answer the door. He couldn't remember any of the blonds words though they were as harsh as his usual ones because of the tone. When he called the ambulance he had referred to the red head as his 'idiotic acquaintance' on the phone with the woman as she inquired on his condition. It winded Matt in the hospital for a few days but the mental institution for three months while they questioned his mind. He had no problem with that, he'd tussled with the best of them with Roger so they were nothing. He sent many of them babbling out of their own offices, logic was nothing to him. He was a Wammy house boy. It was only later that he found out he had gone to the mental institution strictly by Mello's request. Nothing had been the same since.

He stopped the car not bothering to open his car door so that the blond could park his bike as he lit one of his cigarettes. He leaned back his mind flashing back to his night with Matsuda and then the morning following. The look of distress on his face, the begging and lastly the offering of help as if he were really in danger of Mello killing him. The blond loved him, he had to love him he had come to get him right?

Seconds after the blond had parked there was a harsh knock on the window before he gestured that Matt should unlock the door. He did so without hesitation watching as Mello pulled the door open leaning in his arms holding on the top of the car.

"Matty?" He asked gently as the red head put the cigarette out slowly turning a bit. "You left me all night after I told you to come back." His hair covered his eyes giving the gamer a feeling that nothing good was about to happen. "I told you to blow off the steam and come home what did you do?" Matt remained quiet unsure if that was a rhetorical question or not. "You left and went out drinking and was taken advantage of by a man." His voice was deadly low now as the red head frowned a bit. "You have something to say?"

"Actually you said it was over and to get out your house." He replied watching a woman walk with her daughter towards the main street, "You're upset I did what you told me to?" He raised an eyebrow pushing the over out of the way to get out of the car. He needed to be able to at least attempt to make a run for it if the blond grew upset enough to attempt to attack him in public. "It was over so I slept with another guy. It's really none of your business." He shut the car door strolling towards the lift noticing Mello was completely silent. He had never managed to shut the other up before so he wasn't sure if this was good or bad.

He took his time still to unlock the door opening it slowly but his body hesitated as he looked back at the blond who held a blank face raising an eyebrow. He didn't look dangerous or murderous but then again he was a mafia member, a high ranked mafia member it was apart of his skill. The blond didn't make a move to push him nor did he make a move to do much of anything besides sticking his hands in his pockets waiting for the red head to enter. Which he did after gulping.

The first step was the hardest to take as if his body was willing against what his mind wanted but that was illogical the brain told the body what to do. What did he care Near was the logical one. He stepped over the threshold willing himself to make it as natural as possible even after the apparent hesitation but otherwise once he heard the deadbolt slip into place he knew he was trapped for the long run.

Heavy boots sounded behind him before stopping at his back. Next came the arms encircling his waist, black nail painted fingers stroking his abdominal gently Mello's head resting on his shoulder as he sighed. "Mell?" He asked softly. No response just the continuing motion on his body as he frowned. This wasn't like the blond to not have anything to say to him at a time like this especially after the words back at his car.

Mello moved his hand back arms dropping to his side as if in contemplation of what was going to happen next. He already knew slowly reaching his hand out and grabbing Matt by the neck as if it were natural. He did it slowly giving the wide eyed red head plenty of time to run but he didn't move just watched as if it were an outer body experience. Mello's hands tightened closing off air passage part by part his blank look slowly turning into a frown.

Matt gulped his arms lifted to grab Mello's attempting to push him away but he had waited too long it was a firm grasp and his arms were getting weaker without the oxygen flowing until they finally dropped back to his sides eyes glistening from the tears forming in them. He couldn't speak to beg the other but he could see the anger working its way into the blonds eyes until he smirked.

"What's wrong Matty?" He hissed fingers still tightening still as he watched his face turning as red as his hair. "What happened to the attitude. Give me an answer!" He nearly screamed shoving Matt against the wall not once loosening his grip as his free hand slip up the red heads shirt teasing in several places. "This body..." He hissed into the red heads ear, fingers still roaming the others body, "This mind, that face, hair, eyes, body, soul, you belong to me Matty. It doesn't matter if I kick you out. It doesn't matter if I find someone else. It doesn't matter if I say I don't want you anymore, no one is allowed to touch you but me." He watched the tears fall involuntarily from the red heads eyes before dropping him watching him fall like a rag doll against the wall shaking a bit.

He panted softly falling to the side feeling a swift kick come to his side a deafening cracking noise leaving his body before the groan. The blond was asking him something but it wasn't coming to him, just pain. He turned to look at the blond, he was screaming already but he couldn't make out the words. Knowing Mello he was speaking in his native tongue expecting the red head to be able to make out the words. When it didn't happen he felt the fingers come back this time gnarling in his hair jerking him to his feet. He found the motion difficult, the blond had fractured a rib with his kick he noticed as he was thrust against the wall again with the same force.

"Mello please!" He cried teary gaze searching the mans face for sympathy but it never showed. "I'm sorry. Is that what you want to hear? I'm fucking sorry it was a fucking acci-" Another hit to the stomach dropping him to his knees again, "Fuck Mello!" He cried feeling the fingers again searching through his fine hair before snatching it again.

"I don't want your fucking apologies Mail." He hissed as the red heads eyes snapped to attention. Mello was seriously upset, he never used real names, never. "I said do you understand. You belong to me. Always have. Always will." It was short and simple but he understood loud and clear. Mello watched the other nod his head frantically before the frown set itself on his face again. "I don't think you get it Matty." He breathed grabbing the red head by the leg and dragging him back towards him. "I said you belong to me. I mean what I say but I think I should show you." He growled.

Matt shook his head. It was as if he could feel his body bruising around him. "Mello it won't happen again! Please I can't..." He groaned feeling himself turned over and his shirt slipped off over his head and tossed away from him. "Mell-" He whined a fine slap coming across his face to shut him up. It succeeded.

"Damn straight it won't happen again." He said determined pulling the others pants down quickly but leaving the boxers eyes running over the others hardened member. "You're such a fucking whore Matty." He snickered pulling out a chocolate bar and ripping it open before snapping it into pieces. He leaned forward dropping a piece into the other mans mouth frowning, "You probably taste like him, that's disgusting." He rolled his eyes watching the panting red head.

Matt melted the chocolate in his mouth feeling the blond crawl across his body until they finally connected. It was the same sparks of fireworks he always felt when Mello kissed him, always. It didn't matter how rough he was, how much pain he was put into there was always fireworks when they kissed. Mello worked the piece of chocolate until it melted between the two of them. He panted gently when the other moved back before running his eyes over the other a few times, Mello wanted to be undressed. It was only fitting.

The red head leaned forward running his fingers over the blonds vest before slowly unzipping it and sliding it off. His eyes looked up momentarily only to find that same blank look on the blonds face before sighing he did these things for the man he loved. He whined softly trailing his fingers down gently rolling the leather trousers down until he found Mello's own arousal before he stopped.

Mellos arms swiftly grabbed his shoulders shoving him against the wall before jerking Matt's leg uncomfortably over his shoulder before poking at his entrance.

Matt whined gently, "Mello that's going to hurt." He hissed as the blond nodded. The man was teaching him a lesson in the most painful way possible. "Mello please, just go get the lube and-" He stopped noticing the blond wasn't paying his pleas any attention. "Mell."

"Shut up. I don't want to hear your voice do you understand?" He waited for a response but none came. He shoved the others head against the wall, "Understand?" He smirked as he received his nod the others body shaking now. "Good Matty. If you were more responsive when I talked to you I wouldn't have to get physical."

"You feed off of responsive people like a parasite. The more responsive I am the more I encourage you to attack me besides eve if I response nothing I say is going to make you happy unless I'm feeding your ego." He replied coldly bracing himself as Mello leaned forward placing his head against the red heads shoulder before pushing into him harshly gaining a mixed whine and groan.

Mello was smirking but the other couldn't see it, "Then feed my ego Matty. It's simple enough." He replied softly pressing the boy against the wall before creating a decent pace for the two of them. He wanted his Matt back so badly, the one that spoke what was on his mind and didn't give a damn about anything. This new Matt was someone so far gone that he didn't think he'd ever see his beloved red head again until he could bring him back out through the glimpses he'd have to keep a hold on this one. A firm hold.

The pace picked up greatly as they continued, Mello pressing the red head against the wall with increasing speed and want, the red head groaning from a mixture of pain and pleasure though he didn't seem to mind hitting his head against the wall too much. At least until Mello took advantage of his disposition to snatch his hair again twisting it until he was looking directly into Mello's eyes.

"I will never leave you again Mello. Say it." The blond hissed his pace in creasing greatly to make it difficult for the other.

Matt groaned clawing at the others back his body arching to meet the others urges, "Mello!" He cried his leg falling from the others back but the blond quickly put it back. "I-I will-" He stopped crying out when he felt the other hit his prostate. "There! Fuck Mell..."

His fingers tightened before he stopped completely ignoring his need to continue but the other was begging for it. "Say it. Say Mello I will never leave you again." He growled listening to the others whines from under him. "Say it or I'll stop."

He shook his head, "No! Mell I'll never leave you again." He repeated reaching up and wrapping his arms around the other locking him in a deep embrace before feeling the other continue fingers snaking down to finish himself. "Ever. I'm sorry." He breathed once they parted.

Mello smirked, "Good boy." He locked the others arms against the wall annoyed by the marks on his back before drilling into the boy relentlessly. He didn't need Matt coming before his time like a few times before. He thoroughly enjoyed the sounds coming from his beautiful red head until the boy arched groaning a final time before finishing. That was enough to send him over the edge watching the others pleasure filled face. His beautiful Matty. He could never leave.

Matt panted feeling Mello pull out and redress leaving him in the main hallway alone. It was only then that he realized as he felt around his neck that the other would have killed him if he didn't give in. He cut of all circulation in full pursuit of destroying the red head. Matsuda had bee right but he couldn't manage that. He couldn't give in to any other other than Mello. Mello was all he had. Mello was all he needed. Mello was the only one that wanted him. Mello.

[Ah yeah so there's my shitty really long chapter. O.o way longer than usual I think but I hope it was good. The next chapter will entail...a more intimate look at their childhood and what turned Mello the way he is. If you want to read it review babes! Love you guys! Please review! Or else I'm moving back to Agent 003 updates and Once lost. I apologize for any spelling mistakes and otherwise. I fail at reading over because my own work bores me. Anyway I'm looking for a Beta reader. If you're interested send me a PM. I need someone that will tell me if the chapter sucks and needs to be completely written or if the story idea fails at life. Pleaz someone? ]


	6. While Mello's away

[I don't own Death note or any of it's Characters...or something like that.]  
****Authors note: Ah! Thanks for all the reviews on such a new story! Please keep up the hits and once again I'm begging for my reviews. Please! Enjoy the chapter.

While Mello's away

Matt stared at the phone before his emerald gaze traveled towards his bedroom where the blond lay dormant. He had left him alone in the hallway nearly all night before he was able to pull himself up ad make it into the living room. He wasn't even able to lose himself in his usual video games throwing his PSP against the wall laying back on the couch grabbing his cellphone and dialing the number before his mind could catch up with his actions. He needed to hear that gentle, soft voice. That non accusing voice, Mastuda's voice.

"Hello?" The voice inquired on the other end straining while doing something.

"Hey." Matt mumbled hearing the breath catch on the other side. "I'm still alive. Surprise. I told you so." He wouldn't tell the other what the blond had done to him though he wasn't even sure what the blond had done to him. Besides strangle him and maybe snap a rib, it pained him to breath. It could possibly be fractured but he'd have to wait for the man to leave before he could even think about looking at a bruise on his body. "Where are you?" He asked softly finding it soothing just hearing the voice of the man.

The man was silent for a few seconds, "Work." He said oddly. "I'm glad that you're alright Matt." He smiled gently though the other couldn't see him. "I know he put his hands on you, it's not that I've dealt with a lot of abuse cases or that I'm calling you a case its just that it's more like I just knew. How's your body?" He asked softly.

Matt looked down, "Fine." He lied shifting a bit before wincing. "I mean he didn't hit me, just yelled a bit." He sighed slightly hearing Matsuda sigh on the other side of the phone. "What you don't believe me? Mello's not a bad guy he's just a bit stressed, sometimes he needs a way to vent-" He stopped whimpering to himself. He felt pitiful attempting to make excuses for the man that had hurt him so bad hours ago but he still felt as if he had something to prove to the dark haired man.

"He needs a way to vent so he puts his hands on you?" He questioned softly into the phone. "Matt I know it doesn't matter how many times I say it to you but it's not okay. It's never going to be okay and it doesn't matter how many times that you make excuses for him. It's not going to get better. He's not going to stop. It's going to get worse and worse and then he's going to kill you. He feels as if he's losing control of you, that's what he wants. When you're in submission he's in control- Matt please I can help you." He sighed defeated. Even though he had his own job to do here during the Kira case he'd leave for Matt. If only to protect him for a while. "Matt listen to me."

The red head was listening. Each word hitting his ego until he couldn't do anything more than fight back tears. "I can't leave Mell. H-He'd just- I don't know what he would do without me. His personality is so destructive, so dominating, so harmful I can't bare to think of someone else in my position. If I leave he could possibly hurt himself. Mastuda I love him I just can't-"

"Take a break." The man said as if it were the simplest thing he had ever heard. "Take a break from Mello, just go away for a while. We're go together, I need a vacation. We'll run away to the beach together." He said seriously a soft smile on his lips before peeking back in on the investigation room where no one seemed to have noticed that he'd stepped out for so long. "We'll take my car. You'll leave everything and just run off with me, kinda like eloping but we're not getting married."

Matt smiled looking back at the bedroom again. "That sounds interesting but Mello will be pissed." He said gently noticing he was doing just what Mastuda said he was. Making reasons for him not to leave the man. Making reasons why it's okay. He was nothing more than an abused spouse without a ring that was something he refused to allow to continue. "I'll do it. We'll leave for a while so I can clear my mind. I'll leave everything so he can't track me...I-I'll go." He said quickly.

Matsuda smiled, "That sounds wonderful, love." He turned his back to the door. "I'll pick you up tomorrow morning bright and early." He said gently.

Matt frowned, "No. I'll call you when Mello leaves tomorrow and you can come get me." He said softly a bit excited. He was going to run away from Mello but it was going to be with another man. He didn't care if the blond was upset, depressed, angry he just really wanted to get away from him. If he could break from the others grasp for these few days with Matsuda then maybe, just maybe Mello was lying about there not being anything out there for him anymore. There had to be something, someone out there for him still. "I'll give you directions then." He grinned hearing stirring in the backroom. "I have to go."

"Make sure you call, I'll be waiting. It's going to be fun Matt." He said seriously. "A lot of fun, I promise."

Matt nodded, "Okay. I got ya'. I'll see you then." He hung up the phone sliding it back onto the table looking back just as the bedroom door opened and Mello came flaunting out. "Good morning."

Mello glanced at the window. "Nothing good about it." He replied heading into the kitchen. "I see you're awake early." He smirked from where he was, "How do you feel?"

"Pain." He replied quietly looking at the phone with a slight smile. There was still hope for him.

[Ah yes, the next chapter will be interesting enough. Please review for a quick update. Thanks everyone! Matt and Matsuda running away together. Wonder what would happen if Mello came home in the middle...?]


	7. Before the time to flee

[I don't own Death note or any of it's characters or... something like that.]  
****Authors note: Thank you for those that have reviewed. I hope there are to be more on this chapter the last only had one. Thank you for the person that reviewed. Please review or I'll slow the updates and go update Across an Ocean which seems to suddenly be in demand. Anyway please enjoy the chapter.

Before the time to flee

The blond had been sitting across the room typing on his computer for a while now without looking at the red head that had contended his time not with playing video games but straightening the house. He wondered if the blond noticed he had been acting strangely all day, if he had the other surely wasn't showing it going about his business as usual. He had decided to leave the apartment in the best condition that he could before running off with Matsuda. It felt so odd to be thinking about leaving the blond after all the years they had been together.

"Matt." He heard Mello called from the other side of the room as he instantly found himself turning to observe what the man wanted. The grip Mello held him in was so firm he was frightened what might happen if he left the blond. "Come here for a second." He watched as the blond man moved the computer off his lap setting it gently down on the coffee table. "Please."

Matt gently stepped forward but he found his feet moving before he wanted to positioning his body beside the arm couch the blond was sitting on. A strong arm snaked around his waist pulling him onto the others lap where he stiffened a bit unsure what he should do but he found an blond head on his shoulder and his body rocking gently with the other. Mello wasn't going to attack him, the man wanted comfort. He sighed gently leaning back relaxing slightly allowing the other to move him, "What's wrong Mell?"

The man remained quiet for a long while continuing to rock him before finding a voice, "What happened to my Matt?" He asked softly reaching up running his fingers though the others silky red locks, "What happened to the snappy comments. The triumphant smirk. The video game playing hacker that I fell in love with at Wammy house. The one that never cried and took every thing in stride. The one that didn't give a damn about the rest of the world as he had his smokes and game systems?" The blond seemed to be on the verge of tears when his breath caught at the end of the sentence. "The one that I could hold for hours without having him worry what I was going to do. The one that could offer me comfort silently. He didn't have to say a word and I understood everything. My Matty."

The red head frowned unsure what the other was talking about. He was frightened to respond that he was sitting on his lap be apparently the blond didn't believe that. He had asked where he was. Like he had changed over the past few months, he did feel something was wrong with him but he had never thought of himself as a different person. He was Matt. Mail Jeevas, the red head gamer from Wammy house ranked third behind Near and Mello. That was just the thing he wasn't Mail Jeevas or Matt, he was someone else. Someone that didn't have a name in Mello's world or his own, he had changed and now that he realized it, the thought frightened him greatly.

Mello shifted the red head in his arms so that the boy was looking into his blue eyes. "I miss how we used to be before the incident. Why did you do it Matt? why would you take yourself from me? What would I do without you Matty. I couldn't live." He kissed the other gently on the lips his fingers threading though his hair again. He was losing control of the red head and it hurt. Before he had such a firm grip on him, he knew exactly who Matt was, what type of person he was but now the ropes that had bound them together so tightly were only mere threads and it was frightening to him. He would do anything in the world to tighten those strands again and make Matt, Matt. Anything. "I don't want to hurt you again but-" He looked away, he had to keep the red head with him somehow and fear seemed to be the only way but it wasn't working anymore. He had ran into the arms of that other man and it had made Matt even more foreign.

Matt nodded slowly feeling the fingers petting through his hair as he whined softly, "I-I don't know Mello." He breathed gently feeling the other kiss over his neck. "Maybe I need a break."

Mello frowned, "A break? Or a break from me?" The other didn't respond before looking away slowly. He understood Matt wanted to leave him for a while but if that's what it would take. "Where are you going?" He asked gently as Matt shrugged and Mello understood instantly. "You've been planning this." He hissed his voice dropping greatly as Matt stood up before the other could get to him. "You've been planning on leaving me after you promised!"

"What the fuck do you want from me Mello? I'm an emotional wreak! I can't think straight! I'm black and fucking blue and I think you fractured a rib last night and all you can think about is yourself. I'm sorry I'm not your Matt but you made me this way! All you did was make me this way! All those words, the curses, the mental slaps and mind games. I was already fucked over from Wammy house and all you did was become another Roger probing deeper and deeper and now you bitch about me not being myself. If you think I'm broken it's you damn fault!" He was nearly screaming at the other before he stepped back realizing he hadn't had a cigarette since the day before. He needed one and he needed one bad.

Mello didn't respond watching him head down the hallway. He slipped the cigarette out of his pocket lighting up before opening a window. He whined gently staring out the window as he blew his smoke out feel arms around his waist again.

The blond leaned forward, "You can go out and have your fun but if I find out there's something you didn't tell me I'm going to break you Matty. I'm going to make sure that you can't leave me...I'll make you permanently mine so that you'll never need anyone but me again. " He stepped back leaving Matt alone in the room.

Matt sighed picking up his cellphone texting Matsuda, 'Change of plans. I'll meet you somewhere and we'll go.' He sighed leaning against the wall.

[So yeah, when Matt goes out to play Mello shall follow. Nothing is going to be easy for either of them, it's about to get interesting. Maybe a fight or something, I don't know. Also, there will be a few tag alongs during the beach trip. You'll see, if you review. Please do.]


	8. Once in a blue moon

[I don't own Death note or any of it's Characters...or something like that...]  
***Authors note: I never imagined that I would have so may reviews! I love you guys so much so I'm going to attempt some long Chapters so I need you guys to tell me how they're going. Sorry this update took so long I'm a bit sick currently. Please review and enjoy the chapter.  
Once in a blue moon

Matt lit his third cigarette before hearing a car come to a stop behind him. He didn't have any other choice than to leave while Mello was out elsewhere out of fear the blond might decide to follow him. He wasn't sure where the blond had gone but it really didn't matter the short letter left for the man didn't describe much besides he had decided to go on his trip and that he loved him. He was still in love with him at least he believed he was, he'd like to believe so.

The car came to an abrupt stop before the window slid down to reveal Matsuda's unbelievably bright eyes and a wide grin. "You came." He said happily stepping out of the car to engulf the red head in a tight hug. It took a few seconds before Matt could push the paranoia that Mello had followed him out and wrap his arms around the other also. "I'm so happy that you came Matt, you really need this." He said softly running his fingers up the red heads back causing him to shiver before pulling his hand back. "Sorry, I'm just a bit excited about having you kinda to myself. I mean even though you have a boyfriend and all I'm sure that Mello won't mind us rooming together. That is his name right, Mello?"

The gamer nodded slowly, "Yeah, Mell." He said the name a bit sourly but otherwise the name meant so much confusion to him. It hurt a bit to know that he was abandoning the other so easily. "I don't think he'd mind too much." He lied in order to get that wondrous smile from the man again. "So what did you mean by a bit to yourself? Are there other people coming?" He questioned as Matsuda hoisted his bags into the trunk along with several other cases.

He nodded slowly reaching forward peering into the backseat before pulling his hands back slowly. "Later. Yeah, a few guys that work with me is all." He smiled softly tugging Matt to the passengers seat door opening it for him. "Just say your a friend of mine and there shouldn't be a problem. I kinda just popped the idea on them and they deicided to come. One of those invite yourself to something that you have no reason of being there kinda of things. Don't worry about it, I'll be able to talk to you in the hotel room. Try to get along."

The gamer nodded sliding in trying his best to keep his eyes off the backseat. They already knew each other it was he that was the stranger. He decided to keep his distance patting down his pockets before he jerked the DS out of his pocket. He needed the stimulation of pixels which he hadn't received in a mindless numb way in weeks. Slowly he turned it on smiling softly, "Hello world." He mumbled hearing Matsuda's door open and close before the car started with a soft purr.

He glanced at Matt before sighing, "Matt this is Light and Misa. Light and Misa this is Matt a friend of mine." He said softly as Matt froze pausing his game. The name Light didn't strike a cord but Misa, The Misa did. He was sure that he had heard Mello mumble more than once she was the second Kira and this glolden brown haired pretty boy beside her had to be her boyfriend. He sighed, he had come here for a vacation not to work on the very thing that had drove Mello to his endpoint or at least he believed it was the Kira case that had sent Mello postal. "You okay Matt?"

He nodded shifting a bit before smiling. "Ah, yeah it's a pleasure." He glanced over the two of them before extending a hand for them to both shake. Neither one said anything which was good for him that they weren't the type to question anything at least not yet.

"Misa would like to know when Mastuda was away long enough to meet Matt." The girl asked as Matsuda frowned turning out of the parking lot looking at the red head for a few seconds.

He quickly changed the subject, "Matt are you sure it's okay to leave your car here?" He asked gently. "I could have just picked you up from home." He was actually really hoping to get Matt's home address so that he would know where he was in case he needed help. It just figures that things didn't work out the way he had planned them to. But then again he didn't need Misa knowing where the red head lived just in case they did hit it off and she out of the blue decided to visit him. That would be pure destruction for the tiny red head and he couldn't afford that, he just couldn't. He was trying to protect him, save him not get him killed.

The other nodded, "Yeah, some things came up and I don't need Mello being able to track my car." He said gently it only occurring to him now that the blond most likely had a tracker in his car and would find it in the lot. He frowned leaning back in his seat petting the DS in his hands. It was the reason he had brought a new hand held instead of being along his PSP and left his cellphone. Mello wouldn't give him privacy, the last thing he needed was for the blond to see him with Masuda. The mans last words to him flashed though his mind once more, if there was something he didn't tell him there would be hell to pay. He certainly didn't tell him that it would be with Mastuda and he certainly didn't tell him that the second Kira would be accompanying them down to the beach. This trip was going to be hell. That's what he to for trying to run from Mell though. "I-I wouldn't worry too much about it so yeah." He dropped it after that.

Matsuda nodded but Misa pursued, "Misa wonders why you didn't answer her question." The blond was now leaning over Matsuda while he drove the dark haired mans eyes on both her and the road in alternatively quick motions. "Misa is waiting."

Light gently pulled her back his side buckling her in. "Hush Misa. It doesn't matter where they met for all you know they're long time friends. Don't interfere in other peoples personal business." He made distance between the two of them a soft smile on his face now, "Now, please ignore her Matt."

Misa whined, "Aw, Light, you're so mean sometimes. Misa was just asking a question."

Matt nodded glancing towards Matsuda who seemed to have phased out of the conversation not that he did mind though it was about the two of them meeting. He vaguely wondered how they would have answered that question because 'we met in a gay club and ended up getting down and dirty before my boyfriend came in and jealously stole me away. I kinda regretted it but I didn't know what to do but hey I'm sure things will get better,' sounds pretty horrible to even his ears. He decided to just drop the idea in general.

The car ride to the beach was uneventful and quiet besides the soft murmurs in the backseat and Matt's own game playing. As they reached the hotel the group quickly unpacked Light and Misa arguing about their own room. Light insisted he should keep his own room and that Misa should have her own but the blond begged to sleep with him and that it was useless for them to be apart. Matt frowned, his assumption that the man was her boyfriend was completely off. He didn't want anything to do with the girl and from the look on his face he believed her to be a bit different.

He jumped as Matsuda's hand slid in his as the dark haired man pulled him forward closer to his body. They were pressed together only a few seconds as he leaned forward, "Let's go to our room okay?" He said seriously nipping at the others neck causing a soft groan. "Let's go."

Matt nodded slowly following the man leaving the arguing couple or whatever they are to enter the lift.

~~~~  
Across the street the motorcycle roared to a stop. It wasn't hard to think like new Matt, waiting for him to step out to run off. What he didn't expect was for it to be with that Matsuda man and all the touching. All the feeling and then they ran off into the hotel. He thought the red head loved him, no, he _knew_ the red head loved him. The promise that he made, did it really mean _nothing_ to him? No. Matt would remain faithful or else he'd have to get rid of the thing dividing them.

Matsuda.

****Authors note:No! Mello's threatening Matt's only help! Mastuda! Yah yah I attempted to make this chapter longer and I most likely didn't. I tried really but if you want to read more you know the drill review. I'm a busy person so without the reviews there won't be any updates. Please and thank you!


	9. A matter of minutes

[I don't own Death note or any of its Characters...or something like that.]

Authors note: Thanks guys for all the reviews! I really mean it, you guys are the best! Please keep reviewing and I'll keep updating. I'm going for a few updates in a day so yeah, let's do this. I don't mean on this story unfortunately but on Agent 003, Once lost and Across an Ocean maybe a few more, I'm not sure. I have to see how much time I have. Well enjoy the chapter and review!

A matter of minutes

Matt could feel Matsuda's arms wrap gently around his waist as he tried the door for the fourth time, he wasn't usually this jumpy during anything but it was something about the dark haired man that made him giddy. He wasn't sure if it were those chestnut coloured eyes on that happy go lucky attitude but it sent pleasurable sensations throughout him. When he was with the other he couldn't find himself thinking about the bad only the prospect of the good and what was to come and he knew what was the come. He could have told that on the drive here, before he left what he was planning without knowing. His body yearned for the man as it had one yearned for Mello, it still did but not in the same way it used to.

He waited expectantly for the red to turn into a nice fluorescent green before he felt himself lifted off the floor bridal style by the other. He couldn't help but laugh as he wrapped his arms around Matsuda's neck, the man carrying him into the nice suite kissing along his neck. He flashed back to a conversation the two of them had while waiting for Mello to leave and the man said he missed Matt it was only now that the red head believed him. Matsuda did care and did miss him.

He braced himself on his elbows as he fell to the bed a slight smile on his lips, "Well isn't that a trick?" He questioned watching Matsuda set down the few things he had before falling to the bed beside the other. Matt found himself turning slightly to bury his face into the others chest breathing in his sweet scent, he'd missed this more than he believed he did feeling the arms wrap around him slowly in a gentle caring motion. "How can you pick me up?" He mumbled against the others chest as Matsuda let out a hearty laugh.

"Well, you're tinier than you seem to think you are Matty~" Matt jumped at the nickname what Mello had used for him since they were young Wammy house boys. "Not a good name?" He asked softly threading fingers through the others hair as he shook his head slowly against the other his hair making a soft chafing noise. "How about Rover?" He asked as Matt snorted, "It's a dogs name."

Matt laughed quietly tracing the others floral shirt, "I should feel insulted but coming from you it seems so normal for something like that." He shrugged. "No Rover, just Matt. Not Matty, just Matt." He smiled softly feeling he didn't need to change for the other or be his Matty like he was to Mello.

"Just Matt? Okay, well Just Matt what do you think we should do alone in a nice hotel room together with the hopes of not being disturbed by anyone?" He asked quietly feeling Matt smile again him. "It was a question, not rhetorical, let's hear an answer." He shifted the other until he could see his emerald gaze hidden behind his mop of hair. "We could draw or play games or-"

Matt smile lazily, "Make out?" He offered leaning forward pressing his lips to the others to silence him. It had been all just a joke to put him in a better mood than the grim one he had came in and it had work. Matsuda had him laughing in a matter of minutes, something he hadn't done in what seemed like forever it feel so nice, so natural, so wonderful.

The embrace lasted for longer than a few minutes, their tongues wrestled together in what was at first an awkward motion until it grew more passionate, rougher still holding a firm air of something Matt couldn't put his finger on. He pulled back finally feeling the fingers caressing the small of his back as he released a soft groan, fingers spidering up the others chest. "Touta?" He asked softly watching the others eyes widen slightly. "Am I useful?"

The man tilted his head slightly to the side assessing the question slowly, "Everyone's useful Just Matt some people just have to find their purpose elsewhere instead of the place where they are currently." He sighed, "If someone like Misa can find their purpose in life and who they believe to be their soul mate Matt I'm positive that you can also." He smiled brightly placing another kiss on the mans lips probing for entrance that the red head allowed. It only took seconds before words were passing between them without being spoken.

Matsuda's slight aggression said it all he understood that the question was posed from Mello and how the red head felt. The passion flowed like water as Matt found himself straddling the dark haired man trailing his kisses downward over his neck a slow paced grinding between them keeping the tension enough to make him groan when the man shifted.

"Do you think I'm useful?" He asked hearing his jacket unzip slowly. Matsuda answered but he couldn't hear anything, "What?" The movement stopped at the dark haired man glared at him. At first he thought it was a glare because he was bothering him but it was actually Matsuda upset he would ask something like that. He settled down, "sorry, it's just well you already k-know!" He groaned feeling the other run his fingers over his hardening member thorough his jeans.

Matsuda nodded slowly, "Like I said before maybe you're more useful somewhere else." He glanced up momentarily as if trying to display a message but Matt's eyes were closed, fingers gnarled in the pillow behind his head. "Cute." He snickered as the red head nodded feeling his jeans pulled off and tossed away quickly.

* * *

Mello frowned watching the young female move around languidly behind the desk taking her time before getting to him. "Ah! Yes, can I help you-" She looked over him quickly, "S-Sir?" It seemed more like she was questioning his gender than asking to help him. Her look said it all but he decided to ignore it.

He smiled gently trying his best to keep his calm but the pounding fact was that his boyfriend, his lover, his best friend, his soulmate was in a room alone with that, that man. Again. "Yes, my bother's ran away and I'm looking for him. I already know he's here but I need to know what room he's in." He shook his head, "He ended up getting into an argument with our parents and fled with his boyfriend my mum is worried sick. I really, really need to get him home before she breaks down."

She nodded slowly, "That poor woman, sure no problem. Seeing as he's run away I don't think that he would be using his name. Maybe I can associate him with a group. What does he or his friends look like any distinguishing qualities?" She asked quietly clicking away at the computer.

He looked like he was thinking. "Red hair, green eyes, unusual style of dress." He saw her eyes sweep him again. "More gamer looking, kinda skinny."

She nodded quickly before he could finish, "He's with Light Yagami's group up in the suites, I can give you a keycard." She turned around on his chair standing up before strolling into the back.

His eyes widened slightly, Light Yagami? Maybe Matt was on business, he laughed, not his Matt he was never on business even when he was on business. Damn. The red head was pussyfooting around with the enemy and he doubted it even knew it. But he could easily nip this in the bud now before Kira got out of hand but he'd have to have time to think. He couldn't just shoot him, that just wouldn't work. He couldn't beat Near that way though it was easier and gave him more time to focus on Matt, Matt wasn't important at the surface of recent events.

The woman returned with two keycards, "This one is for the room you requested and this one is your brothers room. They're side by side." She smiled softly as he looked down confused.

The room he requested? He forced a smile thanking her softly before heading to the lift, "Near." He rolled his eyes. Once again playing into that little antisocial freaks hands he could hardly bare it and it was all Matt's fault. Oh the red head would be getting it this time around.

* * *

Matt groaned feeling the other coursing though him in a quick succession. He couldn't help but get louder and arching his leg around the other feeling all his troubles slide away during his indecent behaviour. It was the last thing he was thinking about, Mello.

He pushed against the other feeling himself being moved against the headboard where he braced himself. "Yes! Yes! Yes! Harder!" He groaned biting the others neck gently leaving several marks but the other man didn't seem to be paying him much attention anymore his own breathing frantic and harsh as he changed pace again.

Matt cried out.

* * *

Mello never imagined the first thing he heard in his suite was the sound of his boyfriend being banged next door. Nothing in the world could have prepared him for that but the first thing he saw were surveillance monitors displaying the three rooms in different views. His eyes flashed first to Matt and Matsuda against the headboard and his heart sank into his lower stomach.

It hurt more than he had ever imagined. No, that was wrong because he never imagined that he would lose Matt to someone, anyone, ever. He pushed his eyes away to the other monitors Light Yagami, the sepia screen displayed talking on his cellphone and Misa clinging to his arm. He didn't particularly think anything was wrong with that but he much rather watch them than the motions between the red head and the black haired man.

This was just wrong.

[Yeah, so Mello has no audio but Matsuda and Matt are loud enough that he can hear through the wall. He has the key card to their room, oh what will he do next. Please review and you'll find out!]


	10. Helpless time

[I don't own Death note or any of it's character...or something like that...]  
****Authors note: I've been really busy recently. Okay, no. Let me not lie, I've just been out partying all night and haven't updated. So I'm positing two updates right now. Agent 003 has also been updated. Anyway, I'll try to update more and party less...who am I kidding. I might be able to do both. So, please review and the next chapter will come quickly before I pick up on my partying ways again.

Helpless time

Mello reclined on the bed tired of staring at the monitors for so long. The laptop with the Gothic N had been quiet for hours and now more than ever he was happy about the complementary wine that came with the suite. He circled it slowly in it's glass before downing even more, this had to be his third...fourth...fifth? He wasn't sure anymore he just knew that the bottle wasn't anywhere near empty and so he wasn't anywhere near done. He deserved it, finding out he was being tracked by Near, his boyfriend was a cheating whore and the man he suspected was Kira was playing vacation with the group. Life sure did have a way of kicking him in the ass any chance that it got that was for sure. He'd have the right mind to take a good bullet to the head right now but if he did that he couldn't catch Kira and he certainly couldn't win his Matty back from that...that...he was too drunk to come up with insults. Great.

Somehow he wondered if his Matt would answer the phone if he bothered calling but he'd be better off just texting the man in his current state. Of course that didn't occur to him as he scrolled though the nameless numbers until he found the one he knew better than any others and hit dial. It rang for several seconds before Matt answered.

"Yeah?" His voice was as nonchalant as ever and Mello couldn't help the feeling that rose in him once he heard that beautiful voice. The same feeling that rose through him when he saw the man or even thought of him. That pitter patter of love, it had grown from the friendship they built all those years ago and blossomed years later but now things had come to this. "Mell, are you there?" He questioned softly.

The blond pressed the feeling away as best as he could before replying, "Yeah, where are you?" He didn't sound angry just tired but with the way Matt acted recently he might have thought it to be anger. "I went out and you were gone when I came back." He somewhat wondered if the red head would out right lie to him if he questioned him but he was already growing annoyed, "Well?"

Matt was silent for a few seconds as Mello took a chance to glance at the monitors, the red head was laying curled up in the sheets the dark haired man no where in plain sight so he guessed he was in the bathroom doing something. "I left a note." He replied blankly shifting a bit in bed, "And I'm not telling you where I am. You said I can have a vacation."

"From me." Mello finished. "But I also said if there was something you were keeping from me there would be hell to pay. Anything you want to tell me Matty? Anything at all, I won't be mad." He was giving the other chances left and right to admit his infidelity but he either wasn't picking up on them or was just ignoring them all together. As was the way of Matsuda's Matt and not Mello's.

Matt grunted, "Like what?" He questioned softly watching Matsuda come out of the bathroom with a questioning look on his face. "Mell your talking crazy. I went on vacation, there's nothing to tell." He was lying through his teeth and it hurt. He wasn't sure why but it hurt more than anything else ever had.

Mello sighed, "I see." He wasn't going to confront the other right now, somehow it would make him feel like a stalker. Instead his gaze traveled towards the lap top that was blinking. Near must have wanted him for something, great. The white haired boy could wait, "Well I hope you're having fun. I'll see you when you get home. Love you."

Matt blinked, "Yeah...Love you too." He said slowly looking toward Matsuda who had turned his back. "Bye Mell." He sighed gently hanging the phone up and sliding it across the bed curling into a ball. "Bye Mell."

Mello leaned forward fingering the button to answer Nears call before pressing it slowly. "What is it? I'm not in the mood." He hissed reading over the wine bottle several times. he had guessed it came with every room but this was imported, Near had sent this for him. How nice, trying to make peace with the enemy, that certainly was going to fall on deaf ears today. "Well? You heard me."

The computer was silent for a few more minutes, "I was surprised you took the room." He started as Mello opened his mouth to respond but the boy continued, "And then I noticed Matt traveling with the party and believed it was all plan. Judging by your actions Matt is here against your will and judging by his actions you two are not longer, what do people call it? An item."

He laid his head down continuously hitting it against the table, "Near. I. Don't. Need. Your. Judging." He hissed. "Go. Die. Somewhere."

Near again was silent, "I wasn't judging. I was just telling you what I've seen since they have arrived. Light Yagami and Misa Armani are also traveling with the dark haired man and your ex." Mello hissed at the word, "I'm not trying to upset you. If anything I-"

"I don't need your sympathy Near." He snapped cutting the communication. "I know what I've seen."

Matt stared at the wall unblinkingly ignoring Matsuada's words of comfort. Mello had said he loved him, he'd popped the words out but somewhere deep inside him he knew that the other had felt it. He knew that he had felt it because Mello still loved him. All the beatings and slapping and kicking and stomping in the world wouldn't change that. Nothing could change that. Mello was still in love with him and with all his being he believed he was still in love with him.

"Matt come on." Matsuda petted him gently running his fingers over the boys gently, "How about we go out for a night on the strip. Come on there's bound to be something out there to cheer you up beautiful." He smiled hopefully and Matt couldn't help but reciprocate it. "Come on Just Matt, get dressed as we'll take a look around. Even go see a bit of the beach."

He nodded pulling himself up and watching the other man, "That sounds nice." He smiled as the other wrapped his arms around him, "He said he loved me."

"They always say that."

Matt nodded, "He sounded like he meant it. I think I still love him to but I don't think I feel obligated." He nuzzled the other gently.

Matsuda was silent for a few minutes, "If that's how you feel. We can always remain friends." He seemed pained as he pulled away but his face quickly recovered. "Get dressed and meet me down in the lobby. Okay?" He kissed the other gently on the lips before giving Matt some private time.

"Mello's not a they...he's in his own league." He said to himself smiling gently. "Mell."

The blond didn't bother pulling his hood up as he followed Matsuda. He didn't need to he already held the air of intimidation. This was the man that had put his hands on his Matty. The man that had touched all over his lover. His angel. His darling. Oh, if he had to get rid of him, that would be no problem.

****Authors note: Mell is following Matsuda. And there will indeed be a confrontation in the next chapter without Matt to stop anything. Review and I'll post quickly. Agent 003 has also been updated. Still thinking if I want to kill anyone off, I'm not sure. Anyway sorry if this chapter was short, I'm tired the next will be better. I'll make up for not updating. Please Review!


	11. Every Rose

[I don't own Death note or any of it's characters...or something like that.]  
****Authors note: 1100+ hits, that's bloody amazing guys! Thanks for reading I really appreciate it! I've just been working on some things recently taking a hiatus and living life. Not partying just living life but finally I'm ready to post some new chapters so here is the first. I still don't know how I want this to end so don't think that Matt's going to end up with either Mello or Matsuda for all I know there might be a new mysterious player that's going to come in soon. Anyway thanks for reading, please review and enjoy the chapter.

Every Rose

Matsuda held the lift for the approaching person his eyes locked on the floor. He was worried about Matt. He had brought the man out here for relaxation and fun but it seemed like even here Mello was turning out to be a real problem. Matt of course was a victim of abuse but deep inside he could see that the red head was still deeply in love with Mello and there was nothing he could say or do to change that. It didn't matter how much he cared, what he did, how he felt he couldn't change love. He somehow felt like a secret admirer that couldn't bring himself to write the love note and sign his name to it. It wasn't time for that just yet but as his feelings for the other grew he wasn't sure if he could allow for him to go back just to get hurt again and again by the blond. As much as he said it wasn't his problem or his issue each growing minute he spent with the man it became his problem. He'd protect the red head even if it meant his life.

"Thank you." The response was short as the other stepped into the lift allowing it to close behind him. He traveled over to the dials apparently searching for his own level he wanted to get off before running his fingers down all of them as Matsuda frowned. "That should give us plenty of time to talk." He stepped back turning towards the dark haired man, "We've met before, of course Matsuda." A slow smile spread over Mello's face as he ran his eyes over the lanky man wondering what Matt saw in him other than kindness and a place to retreat to. "I think we need to have a long discussion on what's going to happen."

Matsuda didn't seem surprised in the least bit but he nodded. "We do. As common curtesy you're requesting an audience with me so I'll go first." His eyes darkened. He was going to attempt to keep this as civil as he could but by the looks of Mello he could tell it was already going to escalate. A lift was not an appropriate place for a fight but if it happened so be it. He'd fight for his own honour along with Matt's. He breathed in deeply, "I won't allow you to put your hands on him any longer. Matt is a human being that deserves love and respect I don't care who you think you are you're not anyone important enough to put your hands on him. If it comes down to it I'll take Matt to a place that you'll never find him. He'll be so far away from him not even your damned stalker powers will find him."

Matt didn't seem the least bothered examining his nails as the other spoke before finally straightening. "Look Matsuda is it?" His voice held that air of highness as if the dark haired man was nothing better than dirt. "Matt belongs to me. Always has and always will. It doesn't matter where you take him, how far he goes he'll do the same thing all hurt puppies do. He'll return to his master, me. You don't know anything about Matt. You don't know anything about us! Nothing! Where do you get off filling his head will all of these-these." He punched the metal beside Matsuda's head his other hand clutched as if ready to head into the others face. "Matt is mine. You keep your hands off of him. I don't know what you told him that night you met him and frankly I don't care. I don't need a home wrecker telling him anything we'll fix our own problems ourself." He felt the same way he had all the times when he was stuck in the room with Near. He just wanted to hit something, anything. If it was a person all the better.

Matsuda laughed coldly, "I told him the truth. He's an abuse victim and you're his abuser." He said simply his eyes narrowed.

That was enough for Mello. The tightened fist connected with Matsuda's cheek. It was true enough that it was him that caused all the bruising on his beloveds body but he didn't need anyone to tell him that. Despite him still being a bit tipsy he was strong enough to lock arms with Matsuda who also seemed to be fighting with all his might to get the blond down. He couldn't help but laugh at this. The dark haired man barely knew Matt but he was going through all of this for him. Matt was his problem and no one elses.

Seconds turned into minutes as the two continued to punch and kick. Matsuda managed quite a few hits on Mello's face but that only seemed to bring out more anger. He somewhere guessed that Mello was one of those, 'don't hit me in the face' type of people but it was only a fleeting thought as he continued attempting to pin the other. Police training didn't prepare you for someone like this.

Mello could faintly hear the elevator doors opening but he couldn't seem to pinpoint if anyone was trying to enter the elevator. He finally grasped around the others throat pushing him back panting. "Like I said Matt is-"

"What the hell are you doing?" The voice came from the elevator door as the two glanced over to see the red head fully dressed smoking a cigarette. His face was completely blank as he stepped in sticking his leg between the two of them. "Mell you're a damn stalker. Touta, get up. Mello's insane you want to get to him use words not violence." He rolled his eyes hitting the lobby button blowing smoke at them both.

Mello smiled slightly getting off the dark haired man. Their fight would ensue later, "Matty." He said simply as the read head raised an eyebrow questioningly. His eyes searched over the other, goggles, vest, hands in pocket and even his PSP was sticking out beside his packet of cigarettes. The dress was right but his attitude. The 'I'm Matt. I don't give a damn about anything and I'm just going along for the ride' attitude was in full form. This was his Matt. God it had been nearly a year since he had seen his Matty instead of that depressed punching bag.

Matt blinked, "What's up with the happy dog look?" He questioned watching the lights as they moved downward. "It's creepy coming from you." He seemed to be more himself than anything, more like Matt than the person Mello had been spending time with. The green eyes shifted before pulling his goggles down over his eyes, "You gonna answer?"

The blond stood leaning forward kissing Matt gently on the lips, "I want to go home and talk. I want to make things better. Repent." He smiled gently.

Matt blew smoke into the others face, "There is no making things better now Mell." He said simply as the doors opened and he strolled out. "Come on Touta."

[Yep, Matt dissed Mello. Damn straight. I have no clue where this is going but like I said a third person may be added in, who knows. Anyway, please review as I contemplate the next chapter.]


	12. Bent and Broken

****Authors note: Why has thou forsaken me? It is because I haven't updated in almost forever? Is that why there were no reviews? Well in this chapter I gave what all the MattXMello fans were begging for. I'm not sure how long it's going to last but here it is. It's a cute chapter but I think this story needs more drama maybe another companion would do it for me. What do you think? Anyway, read, review and enjoy and I'll try to update soon.

Bent and broken

Mello seemed to be speechless as he watched the other walk away from him. Matt had seriously lost his mind, he wasn't sure kind of insanity that Matsuda had preached to the red head up in that bedroom but that was certainly his Matt and he didn't seem happy by any means. He watched at the dark haired man pulled himself off the floor of the elevator and followed the red head like a lost puppy and he couldn't help but laugh. Matt had finally found someone like him, matt was his puppy and Matsuda was Matt's like squeeze toy. It was adorable in a sick way but he would be damned if he would allow his lover to leave him on such a whim. He didn't care what Matsuda had put into the red heads mind it wouldn't take long before he'd have him back, no one knew Matt better than he did, not even Matt himself.

Mello jogged after the man following slowly behind feeling a bit out of place with the two. Matsuda was glaring over his shoulder every few seconds and Matt strolling along at his own leisurely speed before pausing. "Are you planning on following us to dinner Mell, if so I guess it wouldn't be too bad if you joined us." He shrugged lighting another cigarette as soon as they exited the building.

The blond nodded slowly watching the red head intently, "We haven't been out to eat in so long Matty." He couldn't help but smile when the man shrugged again. "So, are you planning on stay with Matsuda or can we attempt to work this out?" He found himself looking over the slim frame of the red head. His jeans did well with his form, stripped shirt showing off just how fit he was but not even Mello knew how that was.

Matt shrugged again, "You're not giving me time to think Mell, not everyone had lightening quick brain reflexes like you do." He rolled his eyes as they reached Matsuda's car and paused. "I'll sit in the back." He knew Mello all too well to allow him to sit where he couldn't watch him behind Matsuda.

The blond nodded slowly looking over Matt a few more times, "Whatever you say in that case." He shrugged it off sliding into the front seat as Matsuda started the car.

The car ride was completely silent besides refreshing sounds of Matt's PSP in the backseat. To Matsuda it may have seemed like anything but to Mello it was sweet music of the past, a current reminder that, if only for a few hours he was riding in the car with his Matty. His red head, the man he held onto before he became that depressed person that whined and bitched about everything. If anything Matsuda could keep the other Matt as long as he had his red head but because that wasn't possible in any way, shape or form he was going to have to figure out how to make this dinner count. He couldn't lose to the dark haired man and there was a lot more at stake other than pride.

After about an hour of driving around the group agreed on a nice restaurant sitting at the edge of the strip in a tiny corner, the red and black embroidered curtains gave it a nice up tone when the group took their assigned seats. Matt seemed to frown down on the place but both Matsuda and Mello seemed to be in agreement that it was a nice place for them to eat on such an occasion.

"Matty?" Mello offered after a few moments of awkward silence reaching for the menu in the others hand. "Would you like me to read it to you?" It was a well known fact that Matt's French skills were defined only by talking, he slaked off at Wammy house and from time to time he needed Mello, not that it was a problem to the blond.

The red head looked a bit shocked at first before nodding meekly as the blond slid closer to him reading off the menu one appetizer at a time. "Do I have to pick one of these? It's just a bunch of soups, if I wanted soup I could have stayed at home." He shrugged slightly at Mello let out a little laugh glancing up at Matsuda who was scowling. "So I can get something else?"

Mello nodded laying his head on the red heads shoulder, "Matty you can get anything you want." He smiled at the fact the red head didn't shove him off or flinch in any manner. "I'll pay for whatever it is." He closed his eyes slowly enjoying the moment before he heard Matsuda butt in. He had completely forgotten about the interloper on his and Matt's special time.

"Have you decided what you want Matt?" He asked gently as the red head shrugged still going over what Mello had said in his mind. Deep down he believed the others words but he did need some time alone in order to completely figure out his own feelings towards Matsuda and Mello both. He could completely say that he still loved Mello in some shape and form but he was feeling something for the quiet, clumsy man in front of him also. It was only natural.

Matt sighed slightly leaning forward and biting his lip, "Yeah, I'm ready to order. How about you Mello?" He felt the blond nod slowly against his shoulder. He laughed, "You seem to be enjoying yourself Mell, you okay?" Another nod. "Cute, are you going to keep acting like this if I go home with you?" He paused, eyes flashing for a second as he regretted his words but Mello's reply warmed him slightly more.

"I think I've been in the wrong a lot recently Matt but don't count on me getting warm and fuzzy. Put it this way, I'll think twice before I even think about looking at you at home. I'm on thin ice already, huh?" Matt shrugged watching at Matsuda ordered for the group before returning to his complete silence.

Matsuda stood sighing gently, "I'm going to go to the bathroom…I'll take my time seeing as you want to be alone with him Matt." He gave the red head a long hard look before heading off away from the two.

Mello frowned, "What did that look mean? He thinks I'm going to hit you in front of all these people or I'm going to hurt you or something Matt?" Mello didn't move from the others shoulder but he did know that the man was completely silent. "Matty what has he been telling you about me? What has he been telling you about us?" Mello reluctantly pulled himself from Matts shoulder in order to look him in the eyes long and hard. He couldn't remember the last time he saw such a beautiful hue of green but it was staring him back currently without a hint of fear. "Matty, I need to know."

The red head sighed leaning back in his seat fingering the packet of cigarettes in his pocket and eyeing the 'no smoking' sign across the room. This seemed to be a bit difficult for him but there was nothing much that he could do, Mello deserved answers. He was going to get them one way or another so it might as well be him that told the other straightforward what was happening currently. "Well, he told me you're an abuser." He watched the frown form on the others face but he pushed forward anyway, "I'm not going to argue with that. Cuts, bruises and scars tell words like a picture Mell. You hit me, a lot. But I have to say that I still love you despite what he says. Matsuda doesn't mean harm, he just wants what's best for me. Apparently in his eyes I'm the abuse victim and I'm the one that has to decide what's best for me. Mell, you're giving me that look." He recoiled slightly but the blond didn't seem to understand, "The look right before you decide to push me into something."

Mello blinked, "I don't have anything to push you into Matt." He sighed looking up. "Matsuda's troublesome. He needs to go die somewhere and get out of our business." He frowned hugging himself, "It was only when I saw you get into the car with him that I realized how much I was driving you away. I realized how much I need you, how much I love you…Matt don't leave me. You're my everything, my world the only thing that I have left. I know we have a lot to work out, hell; a lot is an immense understatement but I'm willing now that I see that someone is threatening us. I'm upset that it took that much and it had to go this far but please." He leaned forward kissing the other gently on the lips despite the room filled with diners. "Work with me."

Matt smiled gently watching the other, "Mello you're so cliché and stalkery it scares me." He grinned shivering slightly at how tender the kiss had been. "You were there when I dropped my car off." Mello nodded slowly. "So you followed me when I left the house." He paused, "Wait, no, you knew that I left the house. Mello that's some scary stuff."

Mello shrugged, "it's not that, it's just that I can tell when you're up to something. I know you better than you know yourself apparently. That and you weren't in your right state of mind. Matty I drove you into some insane shit but it's time to move forward. Away from the past, and Matsuda." He added suddenly, "And into a future we can be happy with."

The red head rolled his eyes, "It's so cliché and I'm loving it!" He cried blushing slightly at the others words. "Okay Mello…I-I'll work this out with you. I'll try if you try and I can see it in your eyes that you're willing also. Dammit you have me on a string."

Mello leaned forward kissing the other gently on the lips, "Look who's cliché now."

Far in the corner against the wall Matsuda leaned back watching the two snuggled up together and kissing as he realized what Matt had chose. He had run back into the blonds arms, once again. He should have guessed as much but Matsuda couldn't help the feeling rising in his heart. The pain and regret of not telling matt how he felt and it was only now that as he looked over the boys he could see what he could have had.

[I loved this chapter that's for sure. Sorry for not updating in so long. I don't know I'm just a bit of a lot of lazy. Anyway, the next chapter is going to feature a lot more alone time with Matt and Mello alone on the beach. Please review guys! I need it!]


	13. The easy way out

Authors note: Oh gee, this is the first update in a while on this story I have to say. Every time I attempted it I wrote myself into a corner and then quit again. Well here's my last attempt before heading back into the original plot of Matty's vacation or whatever. Here we go. Read, enjoy and review please and thanks guys!

The easy way out

The silence of the beach gave Matt a surreal feeling. Somewhere deep he could feel his skin crawling at the loneliness that this beach gave him. Even though he had come here with the blond he couldn't help but feel alone with the tinted sand and crashing waves in the distance. It felt like some story book but inwardly he could tell that his story wouldn't have a happy ending regardless of what he did. Right now was the time to either get Mello back or lose him all together but inside he felt that losing Mello would mean losing himself but he had already done that. He didn't recognize himself looking in the mirror and he didn't recognize himself right now at this moment.

He sighed digging around in his pockets lighting a cigarette and taking a long drag from it. "Mell, you asked for this alone time and now that you have it we're just watching the waves crash against the beach. It's depressing frankly." He shivered slightly. This beach, the loneliness he felt here reminded him of that place. The place he promised himself that he would never go back to. Hellingly's Mental asylum. Never again. "Say something the silence is bothering me."

Mello shifted slightly his steel toe boots digging into the sand around him. "Matty what happened to us?" He asked finally glancing sideways for a few seconds to watch the others face. Matt didn't react quickly instead he blew smoke into the air around them and pulled his goggles down over his eyes to hide his emerald hues. "Matty don't hide from me at a moment like this. I'm asking you a real question. You asked for words and here they are. Tell me."

The red head sighed reclining into the sand. "I don't know." He said and they both realized the lie. Neither of them needed the other to say what happened. They had lived the trauma, or at least Mello had lived it. He didn't remember anything much from Hellingly's besides the day before he left. He didn't remember nor did he want to think about it. "Well you're a genius, you can answer that question yourself Mell. What happened to us."

The blond winced peering at Matt from under his fringe, "I broke you down with mind games and cruelty until you wanted to end it all." His words caught welling up in his chest before his head dipped. "I thought I lost you that day Matt...you have no idea." His voice was barely above a whisper. He wasn't sure if he was waiting for the other to speak or not but when the silence he remained he continued. "You don't understand, I brought you into a world of nothing but danger. Even though you work for me there are people in this world that would risk their own necks to clip you Matty. People that would risk everything, even their own families to get to you just to ruin me." He glanced over at the red head who had allowed his cigarette to burn itself down to ashes. He wasn't sure what it meant but the other was most likely deep in thought.

Matt didn't seem to perturbed by the others words. "You're right. I don't have any idea what you felt, I was too busy attempting to cast myself into whatever it is you believe is on the other side. Heaven? Hell? Whatever, I'm not one for organized religion." He shrugged slightly slipping the ashed cigarette from his mouth and tossing it into the immense amount of sand where it was lost in seconds by the sweeping winds. "Right, that's why I did it. To ruin Mello. Completely. Nailed that one on the head ya' did." He rolled his eyes.

Mello winced again, "Matt that's not what I meant and you know it. I was utterly horrified to come home to a floor dripped with crimson leading to a locked bathroom door. All I could hear was you muttering about God knows what. Since then I can't get that image of you out of my head, what it was that I did to you. Matt I ran you insane. You weren't yourself anymore and you haven't been since that day." He sighed, "This is the most of you that I've glimpsed in the last nearly year." he reached forward to sweep the others hair away from his emerald hues gently tugging the goggles down around his neck to cast his blue gaze into the emerald one. He smiled, "Oh hai."

Matt didn't smile, he simply stared back just as cold as moments before. "Not Hai Mell. You're overcompensating again and we both know what happens when you do that. You lash out at me and everything else around you, but mostly me. I don't remember what happened that day. What led to me slashing through my wrists. What made me do it...I just- I just remember slight glimpses of Hellingly's and Roger coming in to talk to me the day before I was released back into your custody." He frowned. "That day and up until that point is nothing but a blur to me."

Silence overloaded them once again. Both locked into a feeling of distain for the other even if it only lasted for a few minutes this was something that either they were going to overcome now or never speak of it again and allow it to burrow further and further down into their relationship and eat at the roots of their friendship as it had done for the past year.

Matt leaned against the other, "Tell me what happened Mello. Tell me please." He looked at the other eyes wide searching the others face for the answer to so many questions but none of them seemed to be on the blonds stony face. He seemed to be so willing to hie everything, even the things he couldn't control. The darkness in his eyes grew melancholy before he shrugged.

"I can only tell you...what I know of Matty. I don't know what happened when you were alone. What you did in my absence...but I'll tell you what I can."

The red head nodded, "And then I'll tell you what I remember. Maybe we can fit together the missing pieces...somehow." He couldn't find it in himself to force a smile.

The blond nodded, "We'll put them together one way or another."

[Well this chapter was pretty short but it did set up the basis for the next three chapters. The next chapter will have Mello's side of the story. The chapter after thus will include Matty's and then the third of the trio will have the true story. Hmm, I wonder how they will all differ. Please review guys! If you review I'll try to have the new chapter up sometime by the end of this week.]


	14. Though my own eyes

****Authors note: I've had the time even though the last chapter didn't have any reviews. Gee thanks people. Anyway here is the fateful day from Mello's side then we'll have Matt' s and finally what really happened.

Through my own eyes

I glared at the cellphone again this time expecting to see a text message or at least a missed call from Matt but there was nothing there. The damn boy never does what I ask of him even though I told him specifically to call me today so I could inform him when it was that I would be heading home. I've flirted with men of power and tasted the sweet elixir of freedom and I can't even get my boyfriend to phone when asked. The only man that I've held on in my life since those early days, the only man that understands me on the inside out. My Matty.

I scrolled though the messages from the previous day making sure that I did tell the boy to call me but even if I hadn't he should have known. He knew any other time it wasn't like Matty to be dense. Okay, maybe Matty being dense was made him, him but he wasn't unusually slow and it wasn't unusual for me to want at least one phone call from his a day. He's constantly in danger as am I and I couldn't afford for anything to be happening to him so I want him to call. It's not like I was asking for him to stalk Misa Armani or something.

Mello: What are you doing?  
Matty: livin n u?  
Mello: Ha. Ha. Ha. What are you doing?  
Matt: lol Joker. Texting u.  
Mello: You're damn near hilarious you fag. I'll be home tonight.  
Matt: 2 nite?  
Mello: What are you the illiterate version of me? Yes, tonight. I'll be home tonight.  
Matt: y?  
Mello: Why, what? You little git. Shut up, clean up and I'll talk to you later.  
Matt: K

He hadn't heard from the red head since then but that wasn't usual. Matt wasn't a usual morning person. That or the red head wasn't tripped out of his mind on something that he had acquired while I wasn't home to knock him in the head.

The group of soldiers that had occupied space across the room for me were awaiting a call to come in and I was planning on sneaking out after them to head home. Everything would go according to plan and I didn't need anyone to call and tell me something like that. Mafia business was nothing, catching Kira is the only thing that I'm concerned with but sometimes they ended up tying together. As much as I would prefer to tie my genius strictly to catching Kira I didn't want to hear the insistent whining of lack of money for resources. Keep the peanut gallery dead and I could do as I pleased with my share.

I waited for the time when they would leave. I could have called Matt to listen to his harmonious monotoned voice too occupied with video games but that would arouse questions. Despite the card game passing the time for the men if I were to start a personal conversation or find myself talking to Matty in the way I did calling him sweet pet names and smiling it would arouse questions and they couldn't know about him. Not my Matty. I couldn't allow them to hurt my Matty.

Mello: You okay?  
Matt: ?  
Mello: You' ve been acting strangely lately.  
Matt: Stress.  
Mello: You're stressed? I'm fucking stressed Matt. You sit at home playing video games. Ow, I'm sorry did Mario die? This is real life Matt. IRL.  
Matt: Yeah. Life. K.  
Mello: You're fucking hilarious Matt, just like a clown.  
Matt: K.  
Mello: Did you clean up?  
Matt: K  
Mello: Matt?  
Matt: K. bye.  
Mello: Matty?

I didn't think I was being harsh on Matt just realistic. Sometimes Matt gets stuck in this weird place half into reality. Mostly because of the drugs but with a little nudging he drop right out of it. I was already a bit upset, I didn't mean to make him upset with me.

The call finally came for the group to depart and they did so reluctantly. My plans called for only a few of them to return in one piece, we had already sent out flowers for the widows. It's nothing to get rid of soldiers for the greater good or the group. I slipped out quickly after them planning on going home and giving Matt such a lashing for ignoring me the way he did. He was most likely tripped out of his mind and barely noticed it was me he was texting while playing around or dancing to music.

"Matt!" I snapped after struggling to open the door. You'd think since he spent all day at home he'd at least be doing a bit of home improvement but no he just sat with his eyes glued to different contraptions. The silence that followed my outburst only made me angrier but there was something wrong. No music. No game. No aroma of cigarette smoke to tell me I was home but most of all that alarmed me was there wasn't a red head with a cocky grin on his face to greet me.

I headed down the hallway quickly leaving the door unlocked just in case I needed to make a quick exit. "Matty, love, are you here?"

The silence continued long enough to get me to draw my gun. It wasn't unusual for something like this to be a set up or Matt just joking around but he'd never done anything this drastic before. I wouldn't shoot him, well at least shoot to kill.

The apartment was pristine in condition. The video games had been aligned neatly in their corner, the computers that normally ran code were gone. The countertops in the kitchen had been shined to perfection along with the wooden floors that gleamed slightly from the setting sun in the distance. It only added to my hesitation because soon enough I was going to be in total darkness.

The floor struck a real chord cleaned to a shimmering point besides several darkened spots that trailed down the hallway and into the bedroom. The closer I grew the more and more I realized that the droplets were crimson pools of blood leading me further and further into either a trap or a situation of desperation that I was fully willing charge head first into.

I did. I charged in full run down the hallway and into the bedroom. Trap or no trap someone was bleeding and the knot in my stomach told me it was my beautiful red head. I traced the trailed to the bathroom inside the bedroom where the bread crumb trail ended at the door.

"Matt?" I cried attempting to open it but with no avail. "Matty! Mail fucking Jeevas you answer me!" I screamed each passing second making me more and more frantic to get in and figure out what was happening. "Matty listen to me...just open the door. Answer me! Move! Tell me to go away something!" I tried over and over again to get a response but nothing seemed to get a response. "Fuck it." Instead of kicking the door again I shot the damn thing off it's hinges to get to the other.

And there he sat like a broken ran doll slightly curled into a ball, pools of red liquid around him. Confused emerald orbs stared unblinkingly at the fallen door like it hadn't moved and once I bent down in front of him he continued to stare unmovingly the same way.

"Matty what happened?" I asked quietly gently reaching forward to examine the other arms but he jerked back leaning against the wall shivering. "Matt? What's happening? Did you do this?" I asked meekly attempting to coax him out of his corner like a frightened cat but nothing seemed to be getting to him. "Matty. Who did this to you?"

He whimpered gently shaking erratically as he recoiled. "Mello." He replied softly closing his eyes.

I frowned, "I did not." I snapped attempting to pull him to his feet. "Matty who did this to you...Matty?" I cried but he was too far gone. He simply stared at me with large sad accusing pupils as if it were me that did this to him. I don't think I can ever forget that look. Ever.

"Matty...I had to let them take you away. You weren't yourself." Mello rasped at the end of his story gently petting the red head in his lap. He continued to stare out at the sea, the moon shimmering in the distance as he sighed. "when you went to the hospital you didn't get any better. You didn't know who I was so I let them take you. That was the most difficult decision I've ever made Matty." He leaned down pecking the boy on the cheeks. "And when I got you back you still weren't my Matty."

The words lingered in the air as Matt opened his mouth to begin his own tale.

[Authors note: Well to be written in first person I thought it was good. Though it's written towards you more than Matty. Eh. I don't care too much. Review guys! Please! And I'll post Matty's side. hmm I wonder why Matty said Mello did that to him...] ﻿


	15. Sinful tragedies

Authors note: Well I've been focusing on Agent 003 so here is the update to Enough is enough. Please review guys, when you don't I'm unsure of you're actually reading and want new chapters or just stare at the page for a few minutes before clicking out. Please read, enjoy and review.~

**_Guide to this chapter...._**

_Italics are Matty..._

**Bold is Mello**

That is all. Please review...

Sinful tragedies

_The music was blasting, I remember that much but it was down the hallway. I had forgotten to turn it off before I laid down to go to sleep but I didn't think too much about it. I was too far hyped up on shit for me to really realize that the music was all that loud. I mean sure it might have been disturbing the neighbors but they could call the police until they were blue in the face I was so far gone I don't think I would have even heard the door. I mean as many times as you told me that when you call I need to be clear in my mind that night I don't know what happened. I remember feeling my phone vibrate under the pillow but I was still a bit reluctant to answer it._ Matt paused to take a long drag of his cigarette. He stilled seemed to be thinking but his eyes were as blank as ever._ I did._

"What are you doing?" Mello snapped into the phone. "Matt I didn't call you to listen to silence. I know your mind is pretty much blank and I have to do everything for you but I expect an answer when I go through all the trouble of sneaking out and calling you. Now, I'll ask again you nicotine junkie. What the fuck are you doing?"

_Your words hurt. Each time you talked to me all I could think of was what you had said to me the other day. The more time passed, the more your insults hurt. Even my shell can be penetrated Mell, even mine. I-I just seem like there's nothing wrong but a lot of the time I'm hurt just like everyone else. I'm in pain just like everyone else. I'm sad...Mell I have feelings and for months I think you really forgot that. I became your punching bag...and as painful as it was the more I spoke out about it the more you came at me. To hear those types of insults coming from the man I love, the man I care about it's easier for you to get into my head than you realize Mell. Your opinion of me matters more than all the L's in the world. You didn't realize that and I became your punching bag until-until I simply stopped talking about it. I held it all in and that day I guess it came out. But in a bad way and you weren't there to kick me, yell, or anything to put me back into the place that you had destined for me. I started to believe that I wasn't supposed to fit into that place again...I feel it now. The tinge of sorrow and pain...what I felt after I talked to you that night._

Matt shifted glancing at the clock. It was just about midnight, he wasn't sure what kind of sneaking a bright blond haired, temperamental, leather wearing arsehole could do but if Mello was taking time out for him he should feel special. "Living." He mumbled turning over to put his head under the pillow. "I'm trying to sleep."

Mello frowned, "Did you do what I told you to. Matt I swear to God if that house isn't sparkling when I come home it's going to be your ass do you hear me? What happens if I have to host business? You leave everything in shambles, every...fucking...thing. You can't even clean up properly. What the fuck is wrong with you?" Mello snapped. "You know what Matt, I have to go. Clean up or get out. Pick one."

"Get out?" Matt repeated bitterly. "You would kick me out of my own apartment if I didn't clean some fucking dishes?"

"You really are stupid aren't you? It's the computers, the games, the food all over the damn place. Not only that you don't wash dishes, you refuse to wash your clothes and you don't even listen when I try to bargain with you. I clean everything."

Matt sighed, "You don't. You haven't been here. I clean more than you do but sometimes I just forget. Pardon me for having things on my mind. I've been thinking a lot recently Mell."

He snickered, "You? Thinking? You're fucking hilarious Matty. You don't fucking think. You pawn off my ideas as your own and pretend to make them better. Not once have you come up with your own idea while working on this case. No your smoke your fucking cigarettes, play your games and abandon reality." He snapped. "That's not fucking thinking that just remote processing."

"I quit." Matt responded.

"You quit what?" Mello mumbled softly.

"Smoking. You're always saying I smell like cigarettes and it's really annoying when you say I'm addicted. I told you I can stop whenever I want to. So I quit like four days ago." He breathed under his breath. "I can't stop twitching. It's weird."

Mello frowned, "Because you stopped cold turkey. Good for you anyway. You've finally done something right. Anyway you've wasted my time and now I have to go. Call me tomorrow, okay?"

**Matt I texted you not called you. If you're going to be inaccurate at least allow me to be the nice one. I know it's your side but it's utter bullshit. You're making me look like a incredibly horrible person.**

_You called and then you texted me later. Mell the whole point is for me to tell you what happened and you're interrupting me. Matsuda never interrupts me...So stop it._

**Whatever, carry on.**

_I remember I didn't sleep for the rest of the night after you hung up. I was actually too concerned with you actually kicking me out. It never occurred to me that you might actually just be bluffing but for some unknown reason I was scared. Scared that you would leave me alone and that I might just have to return to Wammy house. I didn't want to return there, I left it once and so did you. I created a life with you and I would do anything to fit into that image for you. The one you had of me. I quit smoking for you Mell, even though it was hurting me to do it. I guess I really am a bit of a junkie but there's nothing we can do about it anymore. My mind was becoming more and more frantic the more I scrubbed the floor and all it kept saying was that you would find someone better than me. A normal boyfriend that didn't pry into your business...someone that you could depend on. I-I don't know why it was happening to me but I was up all night. I straightened the videogames, disassembled the computers and put them away. I washed the dishes, I swept the floor, vacuumed. I cleaned the guest room...the bathroom, the living room. I even re cleaned all the dishes in the kitchen. My mind was so far gone by time you texted me again Mell..._

Mello: What are you doing?  
Matty: livin n u?  
Mello: Ha. Ha. Ha. What are you doing?  
Matt: lol Joker. Texting u.  
Mello: You're damn near hilarious you fag. I'll be home tonight.  
Matt: 2 nite?  
Mello: What are you the illiterate version of me? Yes, tonight. I'll be home tonight.  
Matt: y?  
Mello: Why, what? You little git. Shut up, clean up and I'll talk to you later.  
Matt: K

**You seemed normal enough when I texted you. You couldn't have been that far off your damn rocker.**

_You would be surprised. I had just finished cleaning the kitchen and was settling down curled up on the couch. I wasn't planning on doing anything but waiting for you to come home and that's just what I did. I sat there and you texted me again..._

Mello: You okay?  
Matt: ?  
Mello: You' ve been acting strangely lately.  
Matt: Stress.  
Mello: You're stressed? I'm fucking stressed Matt. You sit at home playing video games. Ow, I'm sorry did Mario die? This is real life Matt. IRL.  
Matt: Yeah. Life. K.  
Mello: You're fucking hilarious Matt, just like a clown.  
Matt: K.  
Mello: Did you clean up?  
Matt: K  
Mello: Matt?  
Matt: K. bye.  
Mello: Matty?

_You started pressing buttons. I was already past my tipping point and you just kept pushing it. I'm sorry that I'm not fucking perfect Mello. I'm stressed out just like you, I'm not sure how you get rid of your stress but at that point I didn't have much of a vent point. I had gotten rid of smoking, I couldn't ruin the living room I just cleaned...to find a game. I-I got up. I wasn't mad at you, I didn't even remember the conversation we had. I just, the knot that had been in my stomach was tightening and I just wanted to get rid of it. All of it, I wanted to make you happy and for some reason I believed you could be happy without me. Everyone would be happy without the fuck up. That's exactly what I was to you Mello. A fuck up. I was below you in everything. Wammy house, intelligence and even in our relationship. Never once had you made me feel as if I could possibly be your equal, if anything I felt like a fucking dog. One that couldn't deal anymore but instead of running away I was going to end it._

_The first place I went was the bedroom searching through the cabinets thinking that maybe I could OD myself. Maybe on drugs or meds but it all seemed to farfetched. There had to be someone quicker that would ease my pain so I went to the internet. I decided I would do the first thing that came up. It-It was-_

**Slashing your beautiful wrists?**

_Yes. It was my final plea. I headed into the kitchen and I could hear a whisper. First it was quiet, soft and if it were beckoning me and it grew louder until I realized it was you. You were calling me to do it, you handed me the knife and I did the deed. It didn't even hurt, I was already in enough pain that at that point if there was any I didn't notice it._

_I don't remember anything after that point. The next thing I can think of was being strapped to that bed in the hospital with you conversing with the doctor about me. You told them to take me away to that God awful place. They had pumped me with so many drugs that I couldn't even speak to tell you I was awake and so I laid there until I fell asleep. It took what felt like hours. That was the last time I saw you for months and I guessed it was because I had failed you. You told me what to do and I couldn't even do that correctly. I couldn't even kill myself correctly._

**B****ut it wasn't me Matty. You were hallucinating. I would never want anything like that for you even if you were to leave me. Matt, you're my life why would I possibly ever want you to kill yourself. It was most likely the drugs mixed with your lack of smoking...**

_No Mell. You told me to do it. You did..._

[And there we are with Matt's side of the story. Was it what you were thinking it would be? I think I covered just about everything. The next chapter will tell the true story of what happened. This chapter was a bit longer than usual. I hope you enjoyed it. Please review guys. I need to know that you're still reading...It takes me a while to update because I don't think anyone is reading...]


	16. Truthful ambitions

Authors note: About time I updated this and maybe My beloved. Thank you all for those who have reviewed but of course I wish for more reviews in the future. I hope to make this chapter a bit longer than my past ones. I'm really, really working on it so bare with me. Anyway enjoy and review.

Truthful ambitions

Matt shifted a bit glancing towards the clock on the wall. Mello would be home in a few hours and for some reason that didn't make him smile. In fact it sent a shiver of pure fear down his spine. He had done everything that the man had asked everything possibly from washing the dishes to sweeping the floor and still he didn't believe it to be enough. Somehow once Mello came through that door all he would break loose and he would somehow find himself tossed in a corner used for the mans personal pleasure once again. This was no longer a relationship. He wasn't sure what it was but it wasn't a relationship.

He had called, the other day to find his lover. It wasn't unusual for him to call Mello to find him nor was it unusual for him to text. He was in the middle of a game so it didn't occur to him to text, no. He shifted the phone to his ear and unpaused awaiting a response from the blond on the other side of the phone. Instead another man answered. Another man had Mello's phone. Another man whoms voice he had never heard before.

"Hello?" The voice responded with a cool tone barely phased at the moment. "Can I help you?'

Matt frowned slightly. Maybe it was a friend. Maybe it was someone that he knew but didn't realize but Mello had plenty of friends that he hadn't met before. It could quite possibly be one of them, of course that's who it had to be. He found a slight smile breathing in deeply before continuing. "Yeah, is Mello there I need to talk to him for a second." his didn't allow his voice to rise. Despite the reassuring words running through his mind he couldn't help but feel as if something were wrong. He was being done wrong and Mello was the cause of it.

There was a tiny laugh, "He's in the shower." Was the reply, "I'll just tell him that someone called looking for him. He's been a bit on edge recently my poor baby. Not to worry I know just how to fix that~" Another laugh. "Can I take a name or something?"

His green eyes were wide as he attempted to find words. "Y-You're his boyfriend?" He questioned softly hands balling into a fist as he stood trailing around towards the bedroom. Their bedroom.

"Of course I am." The person seemed to be scowling. Childish, just like Mello. "Who are you and want do you want?"

Matt frowned glancing to the phone. Mello couldn't trace this number if he tried. "No I'm straight." Then he hung up. Hours he sat staring at the walls of 'their' bedroom wondering what it was he had done wrong. He was always wrong but now it seemed more apparent. The blond didn't want him anymore and if he didn't then who would. No one wanted him, no one. He was antisocial, weird and had strange habits. Who else would put up with him playing video games all day and hacking for money. Who else would care. He fell back on the bed curling up. Most of all he just didn't want to be alone anymore, not after all he had been through.

Hours passed while he sat there dreading the sound of the door unlocking before it actually did. Plenty of times his mind mimicked the sounds the door would make until he stopped caring at all. The blond was at the door watching him with a slightly confused expression through his face seemed strained there didn't seem to be anything out of the normal. Absolutely nothing out of the normal. Mello didn't know he had called and found out and he wasn't going to tell him either. If the blond was smart he'd put things together on his own, he had never had a problem doing it before this day.

"Matty?" He questioned crawling from the bottom of the bed upward before straddling the unresponsive boy. He raised a hand slapping him across the face a few times. "Matty, I'm home wake up." He called leaning forward to see if green eyes were watching him. They were unblinkingly, dead almost. "Matt what's your damn problem? I called you nearly a million times yesterday to tell you that I wouldn't be home when I said I was. It's your fault if you were worried." He smiled slightly.

He didn't respond simply stared. Of course it was his fault. Of course the blond had called, he had seen the phone ringing sure but that didn't mean he had to answer it and drown in the lies of working late when the blond was actually holding another man. "ah."

He raised an eyebrow pointing, "Why aren't you playing your game. I was worried kinda it was so quiet in here..." Mello's eyes narrowed slightly attempting to take Matt apart to find the source of the problem. "Well? are you tried? Is that it?"

He shrugged slightly, "I don't want to talk to you right now." He laid back again rubbing the spot where the blond had slapped him. "I don't think I want to talk to you tomorrow either. Or the day after that....or after that..." He curled up away from the blond man. "I don't think I want to talk to you ever again Mello."

The blond was stunned. The red head was telling him that he didn't want to talk to him. No, it went deeper than that. The red head was breaking up with him. Him. The red head had just...he would never...how could he...who the hell did he think he was. No one breaks up with Mello. No one, not ever and Matt would be no exception. "Mind repeating that again?" He nearly hissed. He felt his fist trembling, he was going to give that boy such a thrashing. How dare he. 'Answer me Matt."

The red head sat up glancing over to the pensive blond. "I said I don't want to be your boyfriend any longer. I just want to be alone...that's what you said right. My choices, be alone my whole life or stay here with you. I choose alone...I think that's what's best."

Mello breathed in deeply, this was Matt. His Matt and no one knew how to get to Matt better than he. Violence would only push the boy further into the hole. He would have to do things smoothly. Easily. He crawled forward willing the fist away before wrapping his arms around Matt and pulling him close. "Matty I want you." He said softly watching the other's wide eyes. "I've always wanted you. I've always needed you...I've always been here for you." he leaned down kissing the boy sweetly on the head. "Tell me what's bothering you and I'll fix it promise."

The man looked away. This wasn't Mello, the real Mello wouldn't have loved anything more than punching him until he calmed down but he wanted to keep Matt and this was the only way he could see fit. It was working and the blond knew it. It hurt that he was really this easy to calm in Mello's eyes. "the man...that answered your phone when I called who was he?" He questioned.

The blond frowned, "The man who answered my phone? One of my business associates?" The red head shook his head. "One of my friends?" Another shake. 'Lotus?" He raised an eyebrow as Matt shrugged. This wouldn't end well. "You talked to Lotus my..." he paused to think of a good word. "Other friend."

Matt nodded slowly, "Yes. I talked to Lotus your other friend. The friend that you spent time with instead of coming home to me. The friend that..."He jerked out of Mello's arms. "Fuck you Mello this shit is over." He attempted to climb off the bed only to be jerked back by Mello before pinned down. "Let me go. I don't want you to want me anymore. If you just let me go you can be happy with Lotus and...I can be happy alone. Fuck all of this."

Mello sighed leaning down and kissing the others ear gently. "Matty. I don't want Lotus more than I want you. It's purely sex, that's all. I come home to you don't I? I spend time with you don't I?" he questioned softly kissing the others neck downward until he reached his collarbone. "I wouldn't have it any other way. If me being with Lotus upsets you then...I'll get rid of him. I won't see him any longer and you'll be my special Matty again."

The man whimpered curling up again. "No."

The blond nodded, "Yes beautiful...you'll be my only Matty once more."

* * *

September 19th  
It has been two days, fourteen hours and seven minutes since I found the pictures and the letters. The pictures of that liar. The pictures of that cheater with Lotus. His dear sweet precious Lotus. The one that he promised to get rid of. You wouldn't believe the letters they write to each other, something that if I attempted with Mello he would call me stupid and immature. Lotus knows about me and he even said that I was no threat.

_Dear Melly,  
When are you going to come home? I miss you so much at night time when you're away sometimes I want to call you but you said not to because that Matt boy would be angry. I don't see why you need him so much just because he's a hacker. I'm not worried about him being a problem in our relationship as long as you realize that you love me and not him. Thank you for the flowers, they were unmarked but I knew they were from you. I was so happy that you had remembered my birthday! My birthday! My birthday that we didn't get to share together because that boy was demanding you home. Finish with work soon and I'll have a surprise waiting for you. Until then  
~Lotus_

Since I read through some of these letters I haven't been able to speak. None of Mello's responses are here but I'm going to guess that it's because he's sent them to Lotus. It hurts more than I can describe having to text and call him on the phone and act like there's nothing wrong. How could he? Why would he? I'm not wrong. I'm not. I know it.

September 21  
It's been four days, three hours and twenty seven minutes since I found the pictures and letters. Each picture showing that...that boy and Mello. He's a stranger to me now. As I read through these letters I realize that the abusive and harsh personality I go through here at home is nothing like the one that Lotus sees. Mello is calm, sweet and caring to him. Things that I have never, ever seen before. It's been one day, six hours and thirteen minutes since I quit smoking. My hands can't even hold the pen correctly. Or maybe it's because I haven't eaten or had any fluids. I rather be drinking if anything. Another letter from Lotus.

_Dear Melly,  
Ugh! I can't believe you could only come over for a few hours. It sucks and I miss you so much when you were gone. I was thinking about what you said and yeah I would love to go to the mountains with you for a weekend. I mean I would have to take a few days off from work but it would be the two of us together for once! No interruptions and just...I can't wait! I hope you enjoyed the pictures on your phone I took them just for you. I love you Melly  
~Lotus_

September 22  
Five days, sixteen hours and three minutes since I found the pictures each one haunted me and so I cut them apart. All of them and my hands are bleeding now. It hurts...a lot. It really hurts, my hands do. My body seems to have gone numb from the text messages he sent me. His words, mannerisms...I've realized that I hate him. I hate him more than life itself. Life. It seems so feeble at a moment like this. Why?

September 23  
I found a letter from Mello. One I guess he was going to mail to Lotus...one that hurt me so much. I need to turn the music down now. It's too loud but I'm so tired and it hurts so bad.

_Lotus,  
I buying my time until I actually say goodbye to Matt. I don't want him to think anything is wrong because we're together and I understand that you want it to either be him or you. I choose you. You don't whine or complain and well for a long time I thought that Matt had been my soul mate but- forget it. If Matt doesn't like my choice then he can just go kill himself. I'm going away on business I'll see you as soon as I'm back.  
Mello._

**Kill himself. Kill himself. Matt can just kill himself. Kill. Kill. Kill himself. Hurt. Betrayal. Lies. Pain. Mello.**

Mello was going to leave him and that music it was blasting...he felt so tired all of a sudden....

* * *

Matt jerked clawing at the restrains that held him glancing around. "No...No! No! No!" Wide eyes ran around the room locking on the door where he saw Mello standing with another man. A man in a white coat? He was in a hospital and Mello was talking to the doctor.

"He's not stable. We're not sure what to do with him but psychiatric care would be best for him at this point." The man frowned watching Mello who turned slightly away from the room.

"If that's what's best...take him."

[FINALLY. It took me forever to get this chapter the way I wanted it to be! Please review! Thanks for reading and look forward to the new chapter soon getting back on to the story. I think I want to bring in Lotus soon...]


	17. Past Transgressions

Authors note: Thank you for all the reviews on the latest installment. A special thanks goes to Near_number_one [My best review ever besides Dom], cutmeawayMYPENMYHAND, InnerShadow, Orange burst, jinnabun [Dom], xxbeyondxbirthdayxx, Shinra'sCrazyTurk and Red-headed gamer for reviewing the last chapter. I love you guys please keep it up. Please read, enjoy and review. Oh and maybe add me to your favourite authors. 3

Past Transgressions

Matt glanced back at the blond the question still burning in his mind was Mello still talking to Lotus? He answered it himself almost instantly. Yes. Of course Mello had kept his precious little Lotus in some scheduled area. He nearly asked the man but that would only lead to realization and pain. Mello had no idea he knew about his 'extra' lover. He guessed this wasn't the time or place but he wanted to know and he wanted to know now.

"Mello?" The man glanced at him, his eyebrow raised slightly. "Mello, while we're talking like this I want to know...who is Lotus?" He questioned watching the man "This is your chance to be completely honest with me about him. I want to know everything." His emerald gaze flashed with fear. "Everything."

The blond frowned slightly, "Lotus? He's a business associate of mine. Nothing more." He pulled the boy into his arms. "Don't worry about business Matty. It's really nothing you should be concerned about." The blond watched the sandy beach in the distance, a slight wind whipping up a bit of mist from the ocean that crashed harshly in the distance. It nearly resembled their relationship, the rocky road they had been on for quite some time now. He still smiled. That would be ending now and everything would be calm once again.

Matt frowned blocking the other from the hug. "No." He sighed moving to stand. "I'm going back to the hotel with Matsuda and you can do whatever." He kept his hands in his pockets after he pulled the goggles back over his face blocking Mello from reading him. It was better that way. He was hurting but the other already knew that.

The blond frowned, 'why? You asked and I told you. What did you want me to say?" He growled watching the red head begin a slow decent up the slight sand dunes back to the path they had followed to enter the beach. Maybe things wouldn't go back to being a calm sea like he wanted.

Matsuda shifted on the bed holding the mute red head in his arms. He wasn't sure what had happened between Matt and Mello. All he knew was that the man had returned shaken up and silent. The entire world he wouldn't trade this moment for anything in the world. Well, besides the happiness of Matt. His poor kicked puppy.

"Misa invited us to lunch tomorrow, beautiful. We can go is you're up for it." Matsuda gave a tiny laugh but was instantly silenced when the red head tightened when the red head tightened his grip substantially. "Matt, what happened?"

He whimpered, "My name is Mail Jeevas. I'm twenty one years old and I spent a majority of my younger years at an orphanage for highly intelligent children. I was ranked third behind Mello and Near. Third in line to become L but- I was never interested in that. I wanted a life and name for myself. I've hacked into the mainframes of hundreds of countries computers, rewritten the most complicated code and even managed to make a name for myself in the pirate universe but I've been beaten so many times, lied to and gone through so much. Stupidly I want him back but I've learned better. I've learned."

Matsuda's eyes were wide. He certainly wasn't expecting that. He sighed pulling the other closer, "Matt-" He began. "Mail. You've accomplished so much and worked so hard. You've come a long way but that doesn't mean the progression stops. It's not your fault, love. It's not, I promise the things you've gone through will make you stronger and you'll get to the point that you never want to look back on that part of your life again. I can tell, you're nearly there, don't worry. All you have to do is give it up. The pain, the problems and Mello." He sighed softly. It was the truth and they both knew it.

Matt gasped at the ending. "Give up Mello?" He breathed feeling Matsuda nod. "But if I do that then..." He fell silent before nodding again. "He cheated on me. I found the letters once. He's moved them since then. He refused to admit it. Can you believe that? All he had to do was tell me. Admit to it. He couldn't even do that!" Matt's voice rose. "Can you fucking believe that?"

Matsuda rocked the man. "Shhhh- of course I believe you beautiful. I believe you. I promise. I promise." He sighed rubbing Matt's back. "Just give it up Matty. Give. Him. Up. I'm here for you. I care for you. I'd never hurt you. I love you."

Matt remained silent for several seconds. 'You love me? Matsuda I-I..." He fell silent as Matsuda laughed. "Too soon Matsuda."

He nodded. "I know. I can wait."

* * *

Mello watched his phone leisurely before glancing towards the wall that separated himself and Matt before standing. He took his time sitting at the computer monitors before glancing at the open wine bottle. He contemplated it before opening the computer again.

He frowned watching his Matt curled up with that man again despite his promises, despite his apology, despite him taking valued time out to come here to bring Matt home. Matt belonged to him. Matt didn't deserve to ask him about Lotus. It was none of his business but he knew one thing. Matt was coming home with him either willingly or unwillingly.

"Mello." Near's monotonous voice interrupted. "It seems as if you've returned empty handed but that's none of my concern. I've set the field. The man we believe to be Kira is four rooms to the left of your suite. I've allowed ample time for you to chase Matt's skirt. There are-"

Mello frowned. "Do you understand that you need to stay out of my business? Don't make me find you Near. Don't fuck with me."

The boy seemed unphased by the threat. "As I was attempting to tell you before forget about Matt, he's not your problem at this point. You need to get rid of Kira."

He ignored the boy glancing back to the computer monitors and sighing. Matt was still in his arms though he had gone through hell just to get him back. If it was going to end like this one of them had to be gone in the end. Either himself or Matsuda, preferably Matsuda would have to be finished. That made sense, if there was no Matsuda there was no one for Matt to run to besides Roger and the boy had too much pride to run back to the old man.

He leaned back against the chair ignoring the droning of Near's voice. He raised an eyebrow fishing his cell phone out of his pocket pressing it to his ear. "Hello?" He mumbled closing out of Nears page completely leaving himself in silences other than his phone. "Hello?"

"You didn't come see me I was worried." A voice breathed into the phone. "I was so worried Melly…I had to come find you myself. It took me so much time to locate you…open the damn door."

Mello glanced over his shoulder where there was a simple knock. He smirked taking his time to make his way to the door and open it. "I didn't ask you to come here. I'm busy, I told you not to interfere with my work." He growled looking down at the tiny boy whoms hazel eyes narrowed slightly at the words. "Don't give me that look; you know what I told you."

He nodded a gentle whine leaving him before he wrapped his arms around the other. "I know. I know but you can't stay mad at me right?" The boy ran his fingers through pale silver hair. "Melly, you can't just disappear from me and tell me not to follow. You remember our promise that we made three years ago." He smiled gently taking the others hand firmly. "Melly…you remember right?"

He nodded slowly running his fingers through the boys' hair. "Yes. I remember." He frowned looking towards the wall that kept him from Matt once more. "Yes. I remember. Lotus, go home."

Again he whined, "Why should I? You're here for him aren't you? I heard that he ran away. Let dead dogs lay." He growled. "You have a home, with me. A place where you can be happy; where we can be happy and still you chase after that boy. How could you do me this way?"

Mello didn't respond, "I still need Matt despite what you want I still need him." His gaze fell again on the boy. Lotus wasn't close to Matt's size; he was small, fragile but had the temper of a lion. A bit cutesy at times, his hazel eyes were large and portrayed false innocence a majority of the time. Mello knew him well, that smile, the attitude, the warmth of his body. He knew him almost as well as he knew Matt, or at least the Matt that he thought he knew.

Lotus hugged his waist, "Are you here for Kira or are you here for Matt?" He questioned as Mello's gaze shifted. "Are you sure?"

He nodded, "Kira. For sure. I understand that the man I talked to today wasn't that of the Matt I have treasured for so long and therefore there is no reason for me to bother him any longer." He was simply saying that for the benefit of Lotus. He was going to get Matt back and he was going to keep Lotus on his knees at all costs.

The boy smiled gently, "Then I'll help you catch Kira."

* * *

Light glanced up from the computer screen before sighing. "Misa did you invite Matsuda and Matt to eat lunch with us tomorrow?" He questioned glancing over his shoulder to the blond girl that bounced on the bed softly. "Yes? No? What?"

She nodded frantically. "Matsuda said that they might be able to attend so there's nothing to worry about." She smiled. "He said he'll come if Matt is up to it or something. I don't know what is wrong with Matt but still I'm sure they'll come with us."

Light smiled turning his gaze back towards the television screen. "That's good. I would hate for them to miss it. Misa, while we're there make sure that you get a good look at our dear friend Matt. His numbers of course, it seems as if he's been a playing force with the Kira rebellions leader. Shame that such a person is going to have to be used for blackmail."

Misa frowned, "Blackmail? Matt? Why?" She questioned watching the other.

Light snickered, "Things will come together, don't worry your" He paused. "Pretty little head about it Misa. Don't worry, I have everything under control."

[Well here's the chapter I promised. ABOUT FUCKING TIME. I mean…sorry for the lateness. Please review and…The next chapter will be better. It's leading up to some really cool stuff. Lives will be lost; relationships and bonds will be formed…yeah so it's getting good. Keep reading guys and please review.]


	18. Danger in the midst

[Authors note: Well here's the next installment. The next three chapters have already been written so when I get enough reviews they'll be posted. That or I'll post them one day at a time. Light and Misa have a pretty good plan so...please read, review and enjoy.]

Danger in the midst

Matt had single handedly managed to block the whole word out from around him as he pranced around the decent sized hotel room listening to his iPod. He noticed that Matsuda had woken up but he didn't let that get to him, right now he just needed to get lost in the world of music though the dark haired man didn't seem the least bit bothered by all his movement, in face he seemed to be slightly amused. Matt smirked slightly taking a stance on top of one of the chairs before pushing himself into a lengthy air guitar that he couldn't imagine doing in front of Mello at any point of their lives. Eventually the song ended and he settled down plopping down right beside Matsuda who lazily smiled at him.

"Please don't stop, I was quite enjoying that." He sat up leaning forward and placing a soft kiss on the mans lips. If this was all he could do to keep Matt in a good mood then so be it. He would do anything possible as long as it meant he could continue to see that smile. "I would ask what you were listening to but I'm scared for the answer instead I'll ask are you willing to take Misa up on her invite for lunch?" He questioned as the red head seemed to be inwardly debating it.

Eventually the nod came, Matt didn't seem to be too bad down any longer. "Yeah, I think we both need to get out." He replied seemingly completely recovered from the day before. It seemed as if the last thing on his mind currently was Mello though Matsuda wouldn't put it past him that this was all nothing but a front. "Actually I was thinking that afterwards we could maybe go out to the beach, when I went with Mello it had been my first time ever. I doubtfully call that a good time at the beach, maybe you can make it better?" He offered watching the man nod slowly. He felt as if he was begging for the man to kiss his wounded leg the last thing he wanted was for him to feel as if Matsuda was a father and not his…other lover.

Matsuda jumped on the opportunity, "I would love to Matty." He replied with a bright smile before he noticed the flash in those green eyes. "I mean, of course I would love to go to the beach with you Mail." He leaned forward running his fingers though the others messy fringe before pointing to the bathroom. "Now, go get ready for lunch and I'll go inform Misa and Light that we're able to go." He pushed himself off the bed making tiny steps towards the door. He paused with his hands on the knob listening to Matt turn his iPod back on and head into the bathroom shutting the door firmly behind himself. He smirked, maybe on their last day at the beach things would actually become a lot better than what they had been before. He could feel himself growing closer to the red head and he could only pray that the other felt the same for him. A burst of happiness sprang through his body that the other might just be able to return his love, might, but that was better than nothing on any account.

* * *

Mello reclined from the monitors his blue gaze sliding from them towards the man sitting quietly on his bed. His gaze brightened only for a few seconds before he rolled his eyes away from him, "Stop staring at me like that." He snapped picking up one of several chocolate bars that he hadn't touched yet. He was only realizing how annoying it was for someone to be observing your every move. Now he knew how Matt felt daily. He slowed unwrapped noticing that the man had looked away just long enough to allow the suspicion of him watching Mello to die down before his gaze slide back again.

Lotus was silent for several seconds before sighing, "You're watching the wrong monitor." He breathed gently laying back on the bed pulling his legs up to his chest. "I've noticed that instead of watching the man that you claim to be Kira you're watching the man still. Don't play me stupid Mello you're not willing to give him up that quickly. He's like that damn chocolate to you it's going to take more than him just walking out on you for you to realize that you no longer need him." Lotus's eyes narrowed greatly but he stopped there keeping his glare at the ceiling only. "Why can't you give him up? Why? I'm here…I have everything you need but still you run back to him."

Mello's eyes hardened, "Don't talk about things you don't comprehend Lotus." He snapped, grip tightening on his chocolate bar greatly. "Just drop it, this isn't a discussion. It's my life and I'll do with it as I please." Another piece of the bar slipped into his mouth. His gaze was no longer on the monitors but on the mirror displaying the man having some form of fit on the bit. "Stop whining or you can go home."

He finally reacted, "I won't! You don't control me Mello! Just like you said it's my life and I'll deal with it just as I want." A smirk cross his lip but his words were met with an automatic to his face. The blond had stood removing the weapon from his waistband and cocking it just short of the others face. He seemed to settle down slightly, eyes wide but still daring. "You're going to shoot me Melly?" He whined softly waiting for an indication, when none came he leaned forward taking the head of the gun into his mouth and running his tongue over it.

If anything Mello seemed stunned. Seconds of teasing from Lotus and he was pulling the weapon from him leaning forward and pressing his lips to the others. The chastise kiss led further as the man determined to get his way pulled Mello willing to the bed with him. Soon he was bringing a firm boot laced foot around him for a clear hold before he smirked. He always got what he wanted. Always.

* * *

"Misa could you keep quiet long enough for me to tell you what's going to happen?" Light questioned glancing towards the door. Matsuda and Matt would be arriving at any moment now and they had only managed to get through less than half of their plan mostly because the girls babbling was incessant and he couldn't quiet her for longer than seven seconds. Once he believed to be back in control he sighed beginning again, "Now, as I was telling you we're going to have our own private room. It's been arranged so there won't be any witnesses so-" He paused as the knock came.

Misa jumped quickly to take it jerking the door open. "Matt! Matsuda! Are you two ready for a event filled lunch, Misa is!" She cried throwing her arms around the red head that instantly retracted inside of his shirt. "Oh you don't like me Matt?" She questioned reaching forward to pet him anyway causing a firm step backwards away from the young blond female.

Matsuda stepped in front of Matt to cover for him, "Misa I thought we were going to lunch not testing your people skills." He managed a small smile before reaching back and taking a firm hold of Matt's hand. His smile widened when the grip tightened on his own. "Shall we get going? I'll be willing to drive." He glanced back giving a slight grin to Light in the distance.  
The brown haired man stood stretching before nodding slowly. "Right, we should get going the reservations won't last if we play around let's go." He tapped Matsuda on the shoulder as they made it down the hallway. He gave Matt a firm, long, dark look before a smile spread across his face to mask it.

Matt shivered slightly, there was something about that smile. Something about that kindness. Something about him that sent distaste though him. Nothing was right about this situation and now it was too late to pull out. Slowly he pressed his hands into his pockets searching for his cigarettes as he slid his addiction between his lips the doors to the lift closed.

[That's the end of this chapter, in the upcomng ones...someone dies and some people are moving back together. Everything will be revealed soon enough. ]


	19. Miguided pain

Authors note: Well because I love you and I'm bored here's the next chapter. Eh, whatever. . Please read, review and enjoy.

Misguided pain

A soft moan slipped from Lotus's lips as he bristled feeling the fingers tighten in his hair before jerking forward. He responded with a small smirk of his own running his finger over the chest that glistened with sweat over his tiny frame. It was moments like this that he lived for, moments like this that he wanted more than anything with his beloved. Ever since the man had saved him it was more than his life that he owed him and so Lotus willingly submitted his body, heart, mind and soul to be used by the other blond man. He whined when the fingers released and the air ran to the spots that had previously been held.

He couldn't imagine that perhaps the love making between both Matt and Mello could possess anymore passion than what was here. The intense look in Mello's eyes, the moans, soft kisses and declarations of love. Lotus wasn't missing anything it was Matt that was missing it all but he wouldn't. Mello belonged to him and no one else. No one else deserved the man and therefore no one else would have him because he was too important, too beautiful and too kind.

"Mello! Mell…" The cries finally broke free of his lips before the blond silenced him with his own sliding his tongue through the gap of his lips beginning another deep embrace. Minutes passed and Mello didn't pull away for anything other than air as he continued to slam himself into the fragile body. Eventually it became too much and he found himself pulled over the edge reaching downward to finish off the tiny boy also. He pulled away panting heavily. "Did I do well?" Lotus breathed crawling forward before Mello placed a hand on his face. That was enough for him.

Minutes passed before Mello was back at the computer screen blue eyes surveying the screen. He didn't look pleased.

Lotus was over his shoulder kiss it gentle, "They're gone." He mumbled softly, eyes slightly wider than usual. It had been his fault that Mello wasn't at the computer surveying the movement of the groups. "I-I'm sorry-" Mello raised his hand and Lotus understood immediately. "I'll find them." He replied gently heading to find his clothing. He didn't know how but he had his ways.

* * *

Matt slipped into the booth seat eyeing all the best ways to exit. There were none. Light had reserved them a room in the very back of one of the best, most private restaurants around this town. He could see why and how the man had done it but there still wasn't enough to pull together what the true purpose was of them being here. Why would he have invited himself and Matsuda, nothing was adding up besides he was trapped in the room with Kira.

Misa had taken her seat beside Light and had begun to talk animatedly about her new upcoming role in a play that would possibly be aired on television and Matt watched Matsuda feign interest, that or he really was interested in the movements of such a balloon headed halfwit. He on the other hand was locked in a silent mind battle with Light who seemed to be taking perverse enjoyment in attempting to mind fuck Matt. Eventually he looked away, it wasn't a sign of defeat, no, it was more of he needed another cigarette and he needed it now.

Light smirked slightly, "Is there something wrong Matt? Looking for the bathroom?" He questioned gesturing outside the doors they had entered only moments before. "It's down the hallway. I've been here before, with my family when we came here on vacation. That's why I knew it was the perfect place for all of us to meet up in on our last day at the beach." He glanced over to Matsuda who still didn't seem to be listening to their silent conversation. "Is there something wrong Matt?"

He shook his head slowly moving to stand up. "Bathroom, right. Actually I think I'll head out front and have a smoke." He replied gently as Light nodded slowly turning back to the conversation between Matsuda and Misa as if their battle never existed. "Right…"

* * *

Standing outside he wondered if all of this was actually worth it. Giving up Mello, being with Matsuda, being mind fucked by Kira. It all seemed a bit too inconvenient. His world had come crashing down around him and once he had began to build it up again something else fucked up came along and shattered it another time.

He exhaled watching the form of spoke plume around before disappearing quickly. He had decided against smoking in front of the restaurant so he'd went to the back where he was assured to be alone if only for a while. Slowly he leaned against the wall sliding downward fighting back the tears that threatened again for the hundredth time since he had to go through all these hardships. His head fell forward onto his lap blocking out the world around him. What he wouldn't have given for his PSP at a moment like this, there was simply something about all of this that didn't make sense. Matsuda, Light, Mello, Misa, Lotus, it seemed as if they were all just a driving force in his own suicide.

Minutes passed and eventually the cigarette burned itself out and he moved to stand once again hearing faint footsteps on the other side of the alley. He paused glancing downward only for a few seconds before a tiny blond girl came around. Their eyes betrayed many years and it was enough for Matt to know that this person wasn't as young as they seemed. "Hai."

* * *

Mello glanced up towards the monitors again and still there was no movements, he trusted Lotus enough to allow him to do something as important at this. The boy wasn't nearly as dense as Matt pretended to be most of the time but he still wasn't Matt. He sighed leaning back attempting to ignore the deadpan voice that continued to speak to him through the monitors. Finally he glared slamming his fist against the desk, "You know what Near? Once this is over I'm hunting you down. I'm tired of all this little bullshit superiority that you've gotten from becoming L. You can't take a bullet better than anyone else." He smirked, "And I have one with your name on it." He reclined again relishing in the silence.

The voice that responded was slow as if picking the words carefully. "Mello's limits of being angry with Near are stopped with violence. Mello does not wish to kill Near because Mello wishes to be better than Near. Mello is bluffing. Mello loves Near." He replied slowly making a quiet noise as if he were playing with something. It was enough to make Mello think of the red head that he could still picture reclined in the living room of their apartment at home tapping away at his 360 or PSP. He shivered in response but glared at the monitors.

"What the fuck was that?" He snapped into the monitors looking as if he were going to throw them across the room. "Did you just say that I-I love you? Where the hell did you get that freakish idea? Who could love someone as fucking-"

Near cut him off, "Mello expresses his love for Matt by harming him. Mello expresses his love for Near by verbally abusing him because he does not know other ways any longer. Mello loves Matt. Mello loves Near." The reply was simple though it hinted that Near was finished with making conclusions with the past. "Matt no longer loves Mello and Mello hurts because of it. Mello lashes out at Near because Mello is hurting."

Mello growled, ice eyes flashing before he punched the wall behind the monitors, "Near you're walking a deadly line shut up."

"Mello is warning Near because Mello doesn't wish to hurt him." He mumbled something softly but he seemed to have left it at that. "Near is now finished with reasoning. Mello should be left alone." He seemed slightly reluctant but the gothic N that raised on the computer disappeared seconds later leaving Mello alone in a silent room before the phone rang. He jerked slightly before picking it up.

"What?"

* * *

"I'm back from the restroom!" Misa sang loudly taking her seat beside Light once again before giving him a slight look. He didn't seem to be paying attention lost in his own world before sighing gently. He had been talking quietly with Matsuda for several minutes now continuously looking towards the door awaiting Matt's return.

Matsuda frowned, "Ah yeah." He stood slowly looking towards the door. "I'll go to find Matt he might have gotten lost." He smiled slightly heading out the door unsure what could have possibly been keeping the red head for so long. The instant pause came when several gunshots ran out leaving the entire room and staff on edge. His eyes widened before all his police training was shoved out the window and he ran for the source of the bullets.

From the table Light stood glancing sideways towards the girl, "Do you did what I asked of you?" He questioned. "Are you sure you wrote it correctly?"

She nodded pulling out the Death note sliding it towards the man, "Of course. I listen to everything my Light says to me." She watched as Light smiled slightly. "That is the one I pointed to the blonds room. We don't have his name."

"But we will." He handed her the Death note. "Misa, run home now it's time for me to finish this." He shifted running towards the source of the violence a serpentine smirk on his face.

The girl nodded slipping the Death note back into her purse and making a run for the door screaming wildly. Thing were coming together, that's for sure.

[Yerp, ingenious plan by Misa and Light. If you send me a PM I might post the nect chapter. This was posted just for Ji and Red-headed gamer.]


	20. Planned accident

Authors note: So, here's the last chapter for a while. Enough is enough is just starting up, though the next few chapters may actually surprise with you. It's all going to end in...interesting note. 3 Please read, review and enjoy.

Planned accident

Lotus raised his eyes to glance at the source of the sounds ahead of him before his breath caught. That hair, those eyes, those clothes, he knew them all too well for him to have never met the infamous Matt. He couldn't help the scowl that set over his face once he looked into his eyes. He couldn't see it, any of it. He couldn't understand what Mello saw in this Matt man besides the implied intelligence of a genius but he could easily supply that. He needed to know what it was that made him special.

"Hai."

He paused momentarily before a slow smirk rose on his face. He cocked his head slightly to the side before breathing in deeply and raising his head, he had to at least appear confident even if he wasn't feeling that way. If Matt truly was this innate genius that Mello made him out to be then him figuring out who he was shouldn't be a problem. "Evening." He replied gently blowing his hair out of his face. "Can I ask what you're doing out here alone in a back alley?"

Matt's signature smirk appeared on his face, "I could ask you the same thing. Your words and demeanor kinda makes me feel as if you were looking for me…or maybe the party I've accompanied here." He snickered slightly. "Who's sent you? Kira?" He shifted slightly feeling the automatic he always kept with him since meeting back up with Mello. One thing he had learned was that you never know what's going to happen. This kid looked like he was innocent enough but then again Mello used to be a choir boy.

Lotus snorted, "Hardly. Try again Matty." He rounded on the man moving slow enough to taunt him but quick enough to close the space between them before Matt shifted taking a step back. "I know everything about you. Where you live, your lover, your past…" He paused long enough to release a laugh, "Your real name."

Green eyes widened enough to see them clearly under his red fringe before Matt pulled the sunny tinted goggles over his eyes. "Right. Mind clarifying who you are though?" He questioned lightening another cigarette and pressed it between his slack lips. This wasn't the time to let fear dominate him. He learned that at Wammy house, fear shuts down the mind right now he needed to be alert.

He smirked, "Come now, use those detective skills you learned at Wammy place." He stepped forward but Matt didn't move. "If I were Kira don't you think that you would be dead by now? Who else would have that kind of information on you besides Kira?" He questioned staying at least three paces away from the taller man watching him shrug. His lips pursed, the man had to be toying with him. It was that or Mello was a complete liar. "So much for all that intelligence."

He shrugged, "I'm going to go on a limb and say that you're Lotus, Mello's lover." He blew smoke into the others face. "You know me but I don't know you.. You have information on me, you know about Wammy…place." He smirked. "Pleasure, having fun with that abusive fuck?" He questioned leaning against the brick wall behind him.

Lotus's hazel eyes flashed slightly, "H-How dare you! All you owe him? The way he stuck up for you. The way he took care of you! The way he kept you." A step forward. "You really are an ungrateful fuck, I knew that years ago." He searched the face for a response but it seemed nearly impossible with the goggles and hair. He could see why the man was such an enigma.

Matt snickered slightly watching the others movements, he was clearly getting a rise out of him. This boy was just as hot tempered as Mello, perfect. "Clearly those were one sided stories. Aw, did Mello want sympathy from his bitch?" Matt recoiled slightly at the words. Up until nearly a month ago that had been him, at least until he met Matsuda. "Nice to see you fell for it. Anything else you want me to clarify." He smirked, "You play little lost puppy well." The words stung him but at the same time he knew they were needed somehow.

The boy was silent for several seconds before it all happened. A jerk of his arm revealed a nicely size automatic for such a small boy Matt understood he was a mafia kid. Soldier or not the boy knew how to use his. Himself on the other hand, he had prided himself on how he had never needed to use his. Ever. There were no other choices, he jerked his from his own waistband shifting quickly once the other pulled the trigger several times gaining one bullet in Matt's left shoulder. It wasn't enough for him to drop his own weapon but in another haze of shooting it was all over.

Matt's stripped shirt pooled blood around the wound before he dropped his automatic clambering forward to examine the boy, hands shaking. Lotus's face was calm, a gentle smile upon his lips as if this was all a set up from the very beginning and Matt was beginning to feel as if it was. His mind was clouded with fear as he checked the boy's pulse. Nothing. He dropped the kid like he was on fire and scrambled to stand making a run for it. He had to stay in the back alleyways lest others see the blood and his guilt. He had shot someone. Not only shot someone, he had killed them. His shaking hands belayed his guilt to anyone who saw him, green eyes clouding with tears once again.

He found a quiet place unsure if the police would check this far out and called the only person he knew to.

* * *

Mello frowned at the frantic cried that passed from the phone to his ears before lulling the boy on the other side with soft sentiments. "Now, tell me slowly whatever that insane screaming was a second ago, beautiful." He raised an eyebrow hearing the other hyperventilating. That hadn't happened since they were children and only when Matt was up shit creek without a paddle. "Matty?"

The boy snapped again, "Don't call me that! He called me that! Stop it! Stop it! Oh God Mello I'm going to jail and- and it's not my fault. Mello they're going to put me to death. I-I can't handle jail Mello. I was already in the fucking crazy house." His eyes widened slightly, "Oh fuck, they're going to send me back to Roger…he had requested it when I went to that place already. They're going to have that fuck evaluate me again. Mello. I'm scared!" He cried shaking horribly.

Mello was already in action grabbing his jacket and walking out the door, "Matty, I'm not going to let anyone take you. Trust me. What happened? No, first, where are you?" He questioned sounding calmer than he felt. The man was going in and out of endless rambling. "Matt, answer me."

He snapped again, "I don't fucking know. I don't know! I just ran! I ran and God it hurts Mello. My arm…fuck am I going to bleed to death? Maybe that's best…Mello I killed someone. Fuck Mello, I killed someone."

The blond paused pulling the phone from his ear slowly not believing what he had just heard. Geeky, technologically advanced, Mario loving Matt had killed someone? Never, not intentionally at least. He slowly placed it back to his ear only to find the man was still talking, "Matty tell me what's around you." He was slightly worried about the others breathing but if he could get there in time he might be able to help him.

Matt paused looking around, "I smell fish, but it's not from the beach." He replied gently poking his arm. "Mello, I'm going to hell for this. Say a prayer for me. Please Mell, please."

The blond mumbled something about religion at a moment like this but ignored it. "I'm coming to find you Matty. Calm down, close your eyes and try to think of something pleasant. I'll be right there." He hung the phone up. That wasn't nearly enough to find out where the boy was but there was only one fish market and Matt wouldn't be showing off his battle wounds, he was hidden somewhere in the background. The back alleys, he would find the boy no problem.

Straddling his bike he glanced up at the sky, storm clouds were moving in from over the ocean. He didn't expect to get Matt back this way but anything was a sign from the other side. He smirked slight pushed his visor down on his helmet and sped off towards his love.

* * *

Matsuda welcomed the rain that fell in cascades washing away a majority of the blood before Matt arrived. It wouldn't be enough to stop them from finding his blood but maybe it would be enough to slow down the investigation. He glanced up at Light who was gently talking to one of the officers that had responded to the scene. Several times he had attempted to locate Matt and failed. The man refused calls, and texts messages. All he wanted was for the man to be okay but it didn't seem as if he was going to get that answer any time soon.

[So yes, it just became interesting. Matt and Mello, Matsuda, Lotus is dead. Misa and Light's plan is just beginning. ^__^ I might update tomorrow if I get the reviews but eh, it just depends. Thanks for reading guys! There are plenty of chapters coming up!]


	21. Coming to terms

Authors note: I apologize if this is filled with a substantial amount of grammar errors...more than usual. I have a migraine and I really wanted to post this for you guys. Thank you all who have reviewed and favourited but I would like to alert you that after this chapter there are only six more chapters until the end of the actual fanfiction. Not to worry I have great news! A sequel is under construction but there will be missing characters and...we'll you'll see. Please review and tell me if you'd like a sequel because if it isn't going to get read I don't wish to post it. Thank you all again. Also, Light and Misa will be at the beginning of the next chapter...I did plan on making this chapter longer but...once again my head. My apologies.

**_Coming to terms_**

The sky had darkened substantially since Matt had voiced his plea to Mello. Hours had pasted and still no sweet release had opted from the sound of a motorcycle. He had long since turned his cell phone off to ignore the worded worried cries from Matsuda. Matsuda who was now one of the police looking for him for a murder he didn't mean to commit but that didn't matter any longer. He was a criminal and he didn't plan on going away any time soon even if it meant that he had to run for the rest of his life. Mello would come. Mello still loved him, the man had stated it plainly on the phone with him so many times and he had claimed to be on his way.

Loose arms wrapped around the red head wiry muscles pulling him to his feet as the man attempted to struggle away until he felt the familiar smooth feeling of leather against his back. Only then did he pause allowing the unidentified stranger to wrap a blanket around his slender form. It was now that the welcome sound of sentiments slip from the blonds lips as he rained kisses upon the pale skin under him. "Hush Matty, I'm here now you're safe. Shhh, it's going to be fine. I'm here now, no one is going to harm you. I promise." He managed a small smile as he gestured towards his motorcycle complete with two helmets. "We need to get your belongings and ditch, okay?" The blond surveyed the area around him with a wide berth. "Okay?"

Matt clung to the blond pressing overly soft kisses to the side of the mans face and mouth attempting to communicate apologies and love with each. "Mello! I shot him Mello! I shot him!" He cried tears welling back up under his emerald gaze as he reached up to pull his goggles off. The sunny hue of orange no longer allowing him happiness, "Please Mell, I don't want to go to jail! Do you have any idea of what they would do to me in there! I can't handle it. I can't! I can't!"

"Matt!" Mello attempted to sooth the other. "Matt! Matty." The redhead continued, frantically clawing at the blond each kiss sending electricity through the blond. "Mail fucking Jeevas you listen to me or I'll give you something to cry about." He hissed shoving the man against the fence. He watched with extreme satisfaction at the calming in those sea green eyes. Mello could hardly maintain the smirk from his voice, "Good Matty, good. We'll talk about it later, we'll talk I promise. Right now I'm more worried about getting you out of town, you're a marked man. We need to get to the hotel and get on the road."

Matt attempted vainly to keep his tears out of his eyes as he watched the other. This was Mello, he was used to dealing with situations like this. The blond had killed countless amounts of people to get his way and here he was crumbling over his first kill, ever. He couldn't handle a life such a this and from here he could leave it to Mello and run. He could flee and possibly hide under Near in abject fear for the rest of his life. He'd be used as a pawn but that was nothing unusual from what he already was in this life working under Mello. That was no way to live life, that and there was nothing stopping Near from turning him in. "There's nothing there I can't replace Mell, let's just go. Matsuda will be there waiting for me." He kept his hands inside Mello's before giving a soft forced smile. "Please Mell? Please?"

The blond nodded wrapping his arm around the red head only to find that he was shaking. He was unsure if it were the pure terror he felt from killing someone or the freezing rain that had pounded his tiny form for hours. The red head was going to have to deal. He led the man to his bike helping him on and placing the helmet over his head, it was one way to hide a red head while escaping a city where the colour alone would alert terror of the citizens. Quickly he straddled the bike himself refusing to glance over his shoulder at the other but in a few seconds after he started it Matt's hands wrapped around his waist and after another few seconds he placed his chin on the mans shoulder. Mello smirked speeding off though the back roads. He'd keep this man safe if it killed him.

* * *

Matsuda wasn't interested in answering any of the questions posed by the police officers of the local district. He was a officer himself, he knew the routine well enough having at least gone though it a few times before starting on the Kira case. He couldn't bring himself to believe that the innocent red head that had agreed to come out to dinner with him could have murdered anyone in cold blood. It wasn't like the red head, it seemed like to him that the man wouldn't have loved anything better than to just sit around and play videogames all day and night.

It was compromising that he had disappeared from the scene though and Light had quickly supplied that the fourth of their party had stepped out for a smoke break and didn't return. The whole situation had him on edge but one thing he did know was that he wanted to find the red head before he did anything danger like going back to Mello. They had come so far from separating the two and he knew that Matt would have a better life with him and not the blond. The blond was controlling, domineering and with all the sense attached to it insane. The man wasn't fit to take care of himself let alone someone like Matt whoms sole purpose in this world was to just hand around and play video games while striking up a conversation from time to time. Mello didn't deserve Matt nor would he allow the man to keep him but in a panic Matt may have very well fled back to the blond and the idea frightened him. He had spoken with the red head about abuse and how just because someone promised to change didn't necessarily mean that he would and in Mello's case that would be just it. He would promise and change for a while before dropping back into it. Colour drained from Matsuda's face

"Sir. I can't give you that kind of information on one of our guests." The woman behind the counter attempted a gentle smile but he could tell that she was one trip line away from calling security. "I can give you a spare key card into your own room if that is needed but not anyone elses." She sighed typing the name "MELLO" into the computer once again. "You've given me no last and no one with that first name matches our records. I'm sorry sir but I simply can't help you."

He sighed leaning forward instantly regretting not having any of Light's calm. "Of course. Allow me to put it another way. There is a murderer hiding in this hotel and your lies are obstructing justice. Would you like me to take you in under those pretenses, you have no clue how a pissed off cop can put a innocent person in jail, do you? I speak the word and just about anything can happen. You can help me out in one or two ways. First, you can alert me if anyone under the description that I gave you come into this hotel and secondly you can hand over the key card, you and I both know you have it." She looked incredulous until he flashed his badge. "This isn't my day lady I suggest you get moving."

She paled greatly watching him with large brown eyes before typing several things into the computers and swirling around in her chair. "I apologize sir. I had no idea that- I-I'm sorry." She fumbled with several different rooms before handing the key card over. "Here you are sir and the authorities will be alerted immediately if that man should arrive with a red head in tow." She bowed deeply attempted to keep the fear and excitement out of her voice. "I sincerely hope that my incompetence hasn't interrupted your case at all. On my behalf as well as the hotel I apologize."

He waved her off already halfway to the elevator pushing the button impatiently. He knew that the blond most likely wasn't in his room but hopefully it would give way to enough clues so that he would be able to search out Matt. He just needed one clue, he was apart of the Kira task force. They took the tiniest clues, picked them apart and used them to their advantage as best as they could and that was what he was planning to do with this.

The stabbed the key card in the first four times before calming himself down. This was going to take time and the willingness to think things though of his own accord. He was doing this strictly for Matt, no, that was a lie. He was doing this for Matt and the future he had planned out they would have together though all of that was one sided he liked to think that Matt had felt something too on their future together. He breathed in deeply slipping the card in once more watching until the tiny red dot turned green. He sighed slipping through the door and into the beyond with his gun drawn. The room was empty, the bed messy as if recently used. For what he didn't know but sitting on the table in the far corner was a row of monitors that he assumed Mello had been using. Slowly he made his way forward first checking the bathroom that also came out empty, Mello had fled and therefore, for now he was safe. The guardian at the desk was watching for him though the alert wouldn't come to him but the police out searching for a man who wasn't truly a murderer.

He took a firm seat at the computer opening the screen stunning himself as the gothic N appeared. It was a symbol he was used to but he couldn't believe that N would be working with Mello. Actually something as asinine as that had never crossed his mind though he wasn't know for well thinking things. He made to close the screen before it spoke.

"Mello the cause for your anger towards me was not needed. I did nothing but state the abject truth about your relationship with Matt. It was quite rude of you to shut down the computer being as it is our only means of communication at this point." N's electronic voice snapped bitterly.

Matsuda leaned forward pressing what he assumed was the talk button. "This is not Mello but Matsuda." He stared at the computer for several seconds before continuing. "There is a situation currently underhand. Mello followed Matt here to the hotel and some events unfolded and it seems as if Matt had murdered someone. I don't believe it to be true but he has disappeared as has Mello. It isn't known if they are together or apart at this time but I need to find Matt for his own safety."

There was a long pause on Near's side before the voice retorted. "You are looking for both Mello and Matt."

Matsuda shook his head. Near always seemed to be so dense, "No. I am looking for Matt who I believe to be in danger if he is with Mello. If believe that in fear Matt may have ran back to him but if I can find him he will be safe." He spoke quickly as if each passing second Matt was becoming further and further away from him. In truth he believed that he was.

Near again took his time to respond. "You are looking for both Mello and Matt." He repeated once again charging forward before Matsuda bothered to interrupt him with his nonsense. "Matt called Mello as you feared because Matt is psychologically dependant on Mello despite the truth you have so boldly attempted to instill in his head. I am aware of whom you are Matsuda and what you do. I am also aware of who you are to both Mello and Matt. Very little passes between those two without me knowing." The electronic was almost creepy when it attempted to relate to the three of them. "Matt will remain safe with Mello depending on your definition of the word safe."

Matsuda frowned, "What do you mean?"

"If you mean safe that he will not be captured by the police then yes, Matt is and will be safe. If you wish for Matt to stay safe from police capture and keep his body bruise less Matt is in more peril than he was before you took him away. Mello is wrathful." He murmured gently into the receiver. "There is no clearer way to put that."

Matsuda gasped staring at the computer. He didn't have much to say afterwards, "…Near-Near help me find Matt. Please help me find him!" He forced before he could stop himself. "I mean, please I'll do anything." He knew he sounded desperate but Near was all he had currently.

On the other side of the monitor Near smirked before leaning forward. This was perfect, he could use this man to track down Mello and keep tabs on him. Incidentally he could also bring Matt in and keep the red head safe but that would come later. "Matsuda, you now work for me. I will assist you in getting Matt back."

[Please review and tell me if you'd like a sequel because if it isn't going to get read I don't wish to post it. Thank you all again. 3]


	22. Back to the drawing board

Authors note: As I've previously stated Enough is Enough is coming to an end but don't fret the sequel is in the works...kinda. Anyway there are subtle clues in this chapter on how the FF is going to end and hopefully you can pick them out. Thank you to everyone who has read, favourited and reviewed! I love you guys so much! If you think I should write thank you chapters for every thousand hits review and tell me. Currently it would be five thank you chapters going on six because it almost have six thousand hits. Yeah, I'm amazed. Anyway thank you for reading. Please read, review and enjoy.

Back to the drawing board

Misa wrapped a towel around her waist sighing slightly leaning sideways to ring out her blond hair. Mello and Matt had fled, presumably together and Matsuda had subsequently disappeared after resigning from the Kira case. She had followed his orders to the brink, everything Light had asked for she had provided, even in this case Light told her, 'what had to be done, had to be done.' The whole situation set into place by fate, purely for the God of the new world, for Kira, for Light. Sitting down on the counter she covered her face and sobbed.

Light glanced from his computer monitor towards the bathroom door which still held a gentle yellow light that flooded into the room. Did she really not know he could hear her sobs through the thin door? Hear her fragile weakness and impossibility? If she could then she would understand why she was useless to him at this point. No matter, her job was complete though he held no real use for her any longer. Matt and Mello were doomed to failure already.

"Misa?" Light called turning towards the computer once again. "I've located Matsuda and now I have something for you to do." He watched the red tracking dot on the monitor screen glad that he had tracked all the members of his task force. "Misa?"

The bathroom door opened and Misa appeared in the door gently swiping at her eyes. "Yes Raito?" She asked walking forward to drape her arms around his shoulders.

He pointed to the laptop at the flashing red dot on the computer screen. "This dot is Matsuda, Matsuda who is searching for Matt who is with Mello and I need to locate both Matt and Mello to confirm that they are together in twenty three days since you wrote in the notebook. Remember that Misa twenty three days and potentially Matsuda locating Matt and hinder anything that's planning to happen in the near future."

She nodded slowly, "Follow Matsuda to find Matt and Mello? She watched him nod slightly before turning back to the computer screen.

He smiled leaning back and closing his eyes, "Very good Misa, you should most likely get moving. Please give me daily updates on your progress on the matter. If it so happens that you feel inclined to reveal yourself to Matsuda just don't go telling him anything."

She nodded once more, "Misa will do anything for Raito."

Mello sighed watching the redhead saunter across the hallway towards their bedroom before pausing. They had time, plenty of time to get in and out unless Near had gotten involved sometime since he had left the hotel. It was no doubt that he most likely had with Mello's sudden disappearance. No matter, he had the red head now and no one living was going to be able to take him away again. That included Matsuda, he didn't care if he had to kill the man if he showed up he wasn't taking Matty away this time.

"Matt hurry up, we don't have as much time as you seem to think that we do." He snapped watching the red head bristle before walking forward into their bedroom. That was better, the man still moved like he wanted him to though he wondered if it was best to ask him now or later about everything that was going on. It was best to get the man talking and then pretend like he was going to forgive him for his transgressions. No. He would forgive him but it wasn't going to be as easy as he wanted to make it appear. He followed Matt into the bedroom to find the man staring into the closet. He didn't have anymore suitcases to pack with, he didn't have much of anything but he still attempted to look productive inside the closet to keep Mello at bay. He smirked, "So Matty, tell me everything. Everything."

Man turned slightly a cigarette already in his mouth as a nervous habit but only now did he light it. He nodded slowly keeping his gaze down as if Mello could read his face. With all that hair and those goggles it made it nearly impossible to bypass the fortress that was Mail Jeevas but Matt didn't believe that any longer. He believed that Mello could see straight through him. That was a complete lie but Mello continued to smirk. "Well." He mumbled glancing up momentarily before gazing back at his own boots. "Matsuda invited me out on a vacation…I thought that it might be nice so I decided to go. I thought you'd say no so I just left. It was easier that way."

Mello shook his head, blue eyes narrowing coldly, "Liar, you attempted to disappear. You ditched your car and ran off with Matsuda. I don't need you to sugar coat anything for me Matty, I'm a grown man, and it's not needed. Don't worry I'm not going to hit you or anything, just speak. Stop lying and speak."

Matt exhaled smoke before frowning, "Right, so I went behind your back and ran off with another guy that was kinder to me and treated me like a real person. I felt as if I could be my regular antisocial self with him and that's what I did. But then you showed up because you're some kind of psycho-stalker and found us…and got into that fight with Matsuda which just proves that you're insane. Matsuda's a lover not a fighter and you putting your hands on him just proves that you're an arse." He dropped the cigarette under his foot before rubbing it out and starting a new one. "I broke up with you and then we went out to eat with Raito and Misa, they had come with us. I knew the danger of him being Kira so I just played it cool and kept to myself. I stepped out for a cigarette break like I typically do in nonsmoking restaurants because they tend to be nice places that don't allow people like me into them because of my dirty habits." He smirked slightly and the smirk continued in the remainder of his sentence. "So while I was out there some kid came up to me and started sprouting off at the mouth about Wammy house and knowing about me and you." He paused for a long while before deciding he should continue without Mello's prompting. "I guess I upset him, he reminded me a lot of you, Lotus did and he pulled a gun so I shot him. He shot me too." He glanced at his shoulder that Mello had patched up as soon as they entered the flat. "I ran and called the only person I knew who could help me."

Mello nodded biting his bottom lip. He pulled the red head into his arms kissing his forehead after brushing his hair out of the way. "It's okay beautiful. I'm not mad at you for shooting Lotus, no one is." He replied lightly though clearly Matt didn't know it was nothing but self defense. "No one is going to get you while I'm here protecting you. I understand you didn't go to Matsuda because he's a police officer." Matt made to pull away clearly stunned. He smirked, "Of course I looked up information on him Matty, you always have to know who you're fighting against…always. But I'm here now, with you and nothing is going go take you away from me I promise." He smiled gently before stepping back. "Now, I'm going to go get us a new car so we can take off and then we'll be home free. I'm used to this kind of thing, okay?"

Red fringe bounced gently as he nodded wiping tears away from his eyes until he heard the sounds of footsteps retreating down the hallway. Mello hadn't been mad, well at least it wasn't indicated in the hug he received so he couldn't have been mad. If he were then why didn't he hit him. Matsuda had always told him that the abuse would never stop as long as Matt remained with Matsuda. Matsuda. He leaned against the wall staring at his cell phone, he had to talk to the man. Tell him that he was okay and that he didn't need to look for him. He doubted Matsuda would listen but, it was good to try.

The phone rang for several seconds before the panicked reply came bursting into Matt's eardrums with the urgency and demanding that Matsuda's voice didn't normally hold. "Matt! Mail! Where are you? Are you okay? Please tell me you didn't go back to Mello. I could have protected you. Why didn't you come back to me?"

Matt winced slightly, "Yeah, I went back to Mell." He supplied sullenly as if he had let the man down. "I'm fine, I was shot but I'm patched up well enough now. Don't worry about it." He tried to put a slight smile in his voice but it wasn't working. "Matsuda I just wanted to call and tell you that I'll be fine and t-thank you for everything that you've done for me. You made me feel better about myself even if it's just for a while. I don't want to compromise your job because you're a police officer. I-I shot someone." He sighed keeping the tears from both his voice and his eyes. "Really Matsuda, Touta, you've been such a blessing and help to me. I didn't deserve you." He flushed slightly, why blessing? He didn't even believe in God. That was Mello's thing. "Stay safe and don't look for me."

Matsuda frowned glancing down at the phone, "Matt whether you like it or not I'm going to get you. You don't have to tell me where you are because I'll follow you to the end of the earth until I can save you. When I said I loved you I meant it. Mail, I love you and nothing is going to stop me from saving you. Not Kira. Not God. And certainly not Mello." He hissed into the phone. "You don't have to worry about my job, I resigned yesterday. I'll find you Matt I just need you to stay safe until I get there."

Matt was slightly stunned. The words love had only ever come from Mello. If his parents had said it to him years past he couldn't remember but no one else had. Certainly no one else in this world cared about him like Mello. Mello did care right? Matsuda had just; he had always…loved him? He was nothing but an accidental one night stand and now-now this. "O-Okay." He mumbled gently keeping his head down.

"I'll find you Matt, I don't care if you like it. I won't let him hurt you anymore." Matsuda's voice was shaking with conviction, truth and love. Matsuda was really coming to find him. His heart swelled, "Stay safe Mail."

"Stay away Matsuda." He replied gently before moving to hang up. He paused, "I love you." He hung up the phone.

Matsuda glanced down at his phone practically beaming in joy. "Yeah Mail, I love you too." He repeated running his fingers through dripping wet hair. "I promise I'll save you from him." He paused as a knock came to his door a slight frown running across his face as he tightened the towel heading towards the door, "Who is it?"

The reply was simple, "Misa. I want to help you find Matt."

[It's almost End Game as most of you can tell. Do you think you know what's going to happen yet? Time is running out and there are only five more chapters and maybe a few bonuses…for how many hits I had on this story. Do you think I should do bonus chapters? Please review and Tell.]


	23. Start of a new life

Sorry about the lack of updates there was a reason. I had originally written out the ending of Enough is Enough on paper and I couldn't find it. It has been found. Sooo there are four chapters left and everything is leading up to the final conclusion. There will be a sequel and it will be posted at the same time as the last chapter. There will hopefully be a link. Thank you all for the reviews! 80, you guys are amazing and 6500+ hits! It takes 100 hits on a chapter before I update so yeah. Anyway please review, read and enjoy. Feel free to say you're mad at me for not updating but don't worry this story has not been dropped! Has not! Has not! Please view guys! Thanks!

Start of a new life [ days 7-14]

It had been nearly two weeks since Matt had shot Lotus and he had yet to realize that he had shot the boy in self-defense which worked all the better for Mello. Since the red head had come back he seemed more and more shut in which had only made Mello more suspicious. Of course he didn't want to bully the man yet, not until he could firmly trap him like he had before. The only thing Matt had asked him was if he missed the light haired, hot tempered Lotus. He had laughed, sure Lotus had matched him intellectually and sure he had been excellent in bed he didn't miss the head man over Matt. There was something about the red head that always kept him coming back. Just when he believed Matty had lost his fight he ran off with Matsuda. Oh the joys of the chase but that point was well over and complete and he didn't enjoy the game any longer. The idea of it happening again… if Matsuda showed up someone was leaving a body bag.

Together both he and Matty had moved into an old warehouse after using a few connections he had been able to acquire all of Matt's favourite games and systems but the man seemed as reclusive as ever. All he did was lose himself in pixels and cars. Hell, Mello had even gotten him his car back and all he received was the lighting of a cigarette and, "Oh how chivalrous of you." before heading in the house. Sure he had taken the engine out but Matt should understand it was all for precaution. He had run away once, can't let the canary taste too much freedom.

"Matty?" Mello tried slinking around the corner glancing into the room they had together turned into a makeshift living room for the red head. Mello could do without it there was no use in watching the same news reports on different days about Kira so it was all for his Matty and his alternative addiction. Incidentally the room was empty. Games stacked neatly, controllers wound up perfectly. It all made Mello twitch. The door was locked and he was the only person with the key. He didn't believe the man would drop so low as to sneak out the window. Or would he? "Matty?" He tried again heading down the hallway towards the garage. That was the final place Matt could be hiding without him being seen by Mello within the last few hours. He opened the door leaning over the banister. "Matt so help me you better be in here-" He paused seeing smoke and red hair rise over the open hood of the Convertible. "Oh."

Matt didn't respond immediately if Mello saw him that should have been enough but once he noticed the man was lingering he stepped back to stare at the blond. "What?" He asked dully goggles pulled fully over his eyes to keep his face expressionless. "You yelling for me makes it sound like I'm going to sneak out the door that's locked from the inside. You're the only person with a key to it. Or better yet jump in the car and speed away. Oh wait, it doesn't have an engine. Yeah, I've disappeared again." He actually managed a pretty decent glare at the blond before turning away. "Really, what do you want?"

Mello grunted straining to see what the other was doing without crowding his space due to his attitude. "You make it sound like you want to slip away. I hope Matsuda isn't still occupying your mind because you won't be seeing him anymore. He'll never locate you ." He smirked, "Besides even if he did I'll personally make sure you don't go anywhere with him. I'm sure you clearly remember the feeling of a bullet piercing your side. Am I correct? You won't walk, sneak, climb or run anywhere anymore."

Matt rolled his eyes leaning back over his car. It hadn't really sustained much damage but it kept his mind off of Mello for a while. Well no damage besides whoever took the engine out had no clue what they were doing. "Yeah, right Mell. Now that you know I'm out here and not running the streets with Matsuda you can go back in the house. Okay? I want to be alone."

Mello frowned, "Matt hear me clearly just because I haven't touched you since we've gotten back together doesn't mean that I won't so watch that mouth of yours. Your little vacation with Matsuda is over and remember we're different people so I won't hesitate to put you back in line where you belong. Under me. Don't get royal, got it? Don't get me wrong, I'm a changed man. I'll only hurt you if I have to. Don't make me have to." He disappeared back into the house.

Matt laughed to himself but it was humorless, "Changed person my ass."

* * *

"Misa really believes that she should do the right thing and help Matsuda in finding Matt." Misa began blue eyes locked on the dark haired man before smiling. "Matsuda is looking for Matt, correct?" She asked as the man nodded slowly still packing his bags for the trip. He wasn't sure where he was going to be heading but he was sure he was going to be gone for more than just a few days. "Misa believes that with a little help from Misa Matsuda will be able to find him before 23 days later."

The man paused turning to look at the blond. "23 days later?" He questioned lightly. He shook his head, "What is that supposed to mean anyway? Is that some kind of code?" he had worked on the force for years and he had never once heard of 23 days later.

She shook her head quickly, "It's nothing it's just after that point Misa won't be able to help Matsuda because Misa has to go do some modeling." She smiled gently staring at the computer that sat in front of her with an N logo stationary as if watching her. "Who is N?"

He shrugged, "You know I really don't know he just told me he was going to help me locate Matt and so I guess I can trust him. It doesn't matter as long as I locate him sometime soon before Mello does anything to him." He glanced to his cellphone that just a little over a week Matt had used to call him. He hadn't been able to get in contact with the man since then but he was sure that somehow he would be able to. He wasn't sure how or when he just knew somewhere on the inside.

"You would be correct in that assumption Matsuda." the electronic voice from the computer resonated stopping the dark haired man instantly. "I thought that you might want to know that I can hear your conversations at this point not that it matters. Welcome to the case Misa A. We are currently detailing your background and locating your boyfriend as I speak not that any of that is important. You of course were present when Matt went missing unfortunately Matt is the last thing on my list to find."

"You told me you'd help me locate Matt." Matsuda snapped spinning on heel heading towards the computer waiting for the response. After several seconds of no response. "Are you no longer talking now?" He hissed coldly.

N remained silent for several minutes, "Excuse me, I'm a very busy person. Incidentally Matsuda I am looking to locate Mello. You will get Matt by order of consequence. My people are tracking both Matt and Mello as we speak. Do not worry they are mostly competent. Well more than the SPK ever was if we're on the subject. If everything works as it should we will take Kira, Mello and Matt into custody. Afterwards Matt will be escorted back to his original home of residence and maybe released into the hands of the police."

"The police?" Matsuda snapped. "Release him to me! Matt is innocent!"

N still seemed busy, "That as it may be he did shoot someone Matsuda. Did you forget or has whatever you deem as love thrown your judgment out the window of what a murderer is."

Matsuda frowned, "Kira is a murderer!" He cried. "Not Matt! How do you know Kira didn't kill that boy?"

N was silent, "There was a gun shoot wound. Excuse me for saying that's anything but natural causes."

Matsuda bit his lip staring at the computer unable to say anything else. It seemed like Matt was at fault but he couldn't picture the man ever hurting anyone. He was so quiet, withdrawn…Matt would never shoot anyone unless he had to. He could have went and asked about the progression of the case but when he resigned from the SPK he had also resigned from the police force. He shook his head, he'd have to figure out how to get Matt away from Near once this was over also. He sighed, this is just going to be great.

"Do not worry Matsuda Matt will be located. Mello comes first because he's actually dangerous. As for now there is an apartment waiting for you and Miss Misa I will make arranges for you also…I guess. After that we will attempt to make contact with Matt. It will only take a few days. There is a car waiting outside. I will be in contact." the screen went blank once more.

Matsuda shook his head closing his suitcase heading out the door. "Matty, I'm coming. I promised you."

Misa sighed standing and following the dark haired man instantly texting Raito. "N is involved in the case. He is going to locate them for us."

* * *

Raito reclined in his easy chair smirking, "Perfect, less work for me." He texted back, "Good Misa, keep in contact."

* * *

Near shook his head crawling across the floor to his toys. "Locate Mello. Find Matt. Take Mello in…not as easy as it sounds. One man can be a whole army." He frowned glancing to the pictures on the screen of Matt, Mello and Misa. He had to save lives, find Kira and spare people. His job was harder than a lot of people though. Though with Misa "joining" the investigation he could monitor "L" and her at the same time. Matsuda didn't understand just how useful he actually was.

* * *

Thanks for reading. When this chapter gets 100+ hits I'll update. Please review guys! I want to know how you think everything is going to end...and some of you will hate me. Just saying.


	24. Location is key

[Authors note: I'm not even going to lie I am so sorry it took a year for this to be uploaded. I swear I am. I would explain to you what happened but I'm going to guess at this point you don't want to hear that. So allow me to say this, for those of you still following this and still wanting that sequel I'm going to write it. Actually, the first chapter of the sequel will be posted at the same time as the last chapter of this story. Yes, it is endgame and there is only one chapter left after this one. For those of you who have waited, it's going to be big. HUGE actually. I can truthfully say it should be uploaded within the next few days so be looking for it. As I always say please read, review and enjoy.

Location is key [days 14-20]

Matt could faintly hear the sound of typing on the computer from down the hallway. He didn't bother to go check because he already knew who it was. Mello hadn't left him once since they moved into this abomination of an apartment. The man was paranoid, more so than he usually was that Near was following him and going to close in on their wareabouts. Faintly he was worried about the same but for different reasons. He had killed someone albeit accidentally someone still wound up dead. He hadn't been able to sleep for weeks.

Each time he attempted to close his eyes all he could see was Lotus and how the man had come to affect his life more than he already had. He found himself tossing and turning before waking in a cold sweat stifling his screams. His relationship was ruined, his love ruined and now he was captive of the man he had once loved and called his best friend. That wasn't all that had happened recently. The blond had been attempting to start conversations with him that he easily brushed off.

The first few days had been trivial conversations about the weather outside and how thankful Matt should feel that had hadn't bothered boarding them up. The next few days were about trust. The tiny amount of trust Mello had instilled within him not to sneak out the window while Mello was sleeping in their bedroom and that Matt must still have _some_ respect for himself at this point. And finally Mello had been attempting to engage him into talking about their lengthy past together. None of which was working simply because he was afraid of Mello

It wasn't that the man could possibly hit him but that in recent days Mello had begun to act strangely. The blond had completely stopped eating chocolate. Each time Matt would check the fridge it was the exact same amount that had been in there previously. When asked about it Mello simply stared at him for endless minutes it seemed. Secondly, the blond had begun locking himself in the bathroom for long hours in some form of heated conversation with himself.

Originally Matt had believed that he was talking to his mafia confidents until he had found his cellphone sitting leisurely on the kitchen table with the remainder of breakfast that Mello didn't touch. He glanced down the hallway before biting his lip. "Mell?" He asked softly taking a cautious step forward knowing that the blond could easily be armed. He was more worried about the man shooting through the door than actually attacking him. "Mell, are you okay?"

_"They don't think I know. It's too bad that I've managed to figure everything out at this point. Lotus, Matt, Matsuda, Near, The recent Mello and the one formerly named Mello…Yes, I've managed to figure everything out. They can't know yet, if they do nothing will go right and I'll never become L." _The voice paused for several seconds before laughing. _"If there ever was an L position to be offered. I should have known better form the very beginning. How silly could everyone be fighting and bickering over something that wasn't meant to be won in the first place. Silly Near. Silly Matt. Silly Mello." _

The red head paused at the door his eyes widening as he palmed the phone in his hand. He could call for help but he couldn't tell anyone where he was and the doors were locked so once Mello found out there was nothing he could do. Instead he knocked lightly on the door and the talking ceased. "Mell, you left your phone."

The door clicked unlocked before the blond stood in the doorway watching the red head with darkened eyes. "You don't think I know." He said softly as Matt raised an eyebrow. "You don't think that I know because I do. I have it all figured out, I've figured it all out." He took a step forward as Matt held up the cellphone for the other as a sign of peace. "You're not my Matty."

The red head laughed though he wasn't sure if it was out of confusion or humor. Maybe a bit of both in this situation. "Really Mello? Then who am I if I'm not Matt?" He rolled his eyes. He had enough of mind games for a lifetime while dealing with this man and now this. "Well?"

Mello sniggered still not reaching for the phone. "You're Near. So very clever making me think that you're my Matty and infiltrating our home, our lives and then making me think that I'm crazy." He pointed to his head, "But I've gotten it all figured out and I'm not going to let this happen. You're going to tell me where my Matty is and then I'm going to do to you what I should have done ages ago."

Green eyes shifted to blue ones before noticing the distant look in the blond's eyes. "Mello I am Matt." He whispered taking a step back to put a bit of distance between the two of them with the hope that he could stop what he believed was coming. "Remember, we've been best friends for years. You protected me in Wammy house and then you left to pursue Kira. It's me, Matty."

The blond smiled coldly shaking his head taking another booted step. "My Matty would never leave me, Near." He licked his lips lightly taking another step. "Let's end this tonight Near. It's gone on too long I'm sure that you can agree to that."

The phone in Matt's hand began a soft vibration as he held it up in confusion. Mello snatched it causing the red head to flinch in the process. The blond simply looked amused and predatorily at the phone in his hand before pressing both the talk button and speaker.

"Talk and do it quickly. I'm busy right now."

"Mello." The voice cut through the room like a knife as Matt breathed a sigh of relief. It was Near, maybe this would knock the blond off of his crazy train. Sure, it was a bit too well timed but things happened like this, right?

Mello sneered, "Neat trick Near." He hissed deadly as Matt snapped to attention his eyes turning instantly towards their bedroom and judging the distance. "I'm tired of your games. Give me Matt back if you don't want to die."

Near was silent for several minutes on the phone before replying incredulously, "Don't you have Matt with you? Mello, I don't know what's happening to you but you're wanted and I'm going to bring you and Matt in."

The blond shook his head watching Matt's eyes with a bored expression. "If you think you can make it…run."

Matt darted as soon as the other gave him permission nearly tripping once he reached the end of the hallway to make the sharp right turn into the bedroom. The room itself wouldn't do him any good even if he managed to lock it somehow. The door itself only locked from the outside and Mello had the only key to it also. What he wanted was the only thing that could permanently save him from Mello. He tackled the bed sliding to the other side fiddling with the bedside drawer that he was positive that Mello kept his gun in.

The drawer was more difficult to get open than he had originally believed it would be but it finally clicked and slid open just as the tsking came from the door of the bedroom. He rolled over finding the blond standing entertained at the door with his gun pointed towards Matt.

"You never were good at running Near." He said in a quiet whisper. "That's okay though because when you tell me where Matt is you'll never have to run again. Ever again."

"Mello!" The voice on the other side of the phone almost sounded panicked if it wasn't for the deadpan tone. "I am Near. I am Near."

Matt's blood chilled as he heard the blond begin a manic fit of laughter. "Whatever you say Near. Whatever you say." He hissed hanging the phone up before Near could continue. "Pre-recorded message so that I wouldn't suspect anything, right Near?" He asked strolling towards the bed where Matt laid dumbstruck. "It's okay, I expected this too. I may have come second to you in analytical deduction but I've seen through this entire thing but after tonight I'll never come in second." He cocked the gun pointing it at the red head.

* * *

Near stared at the phone for several seconds before standing, "You have the location correct?" He said quickly as the woman nodded slowly as if waiting for instruction. "I need Masuda on the phone, a reply of what just transpired and a car with us in it on the way to the destination within the next ten minutes."

The group exchanged looks before moving out with ease. Hallie frowned watching Near watch the phone as if it was going to ring. "Near." She whispered wanting to pat him on the shoulder but she kept her distance. "Everything will be fine. I'm sure that Mello's just playing games with you to intimidate you. Don't let him get to you."

He shook his head slowly, "That's not how Mello works. He would never call Matt by my name and he would never forget about someone tracking a phone call. He stayed on the phone with me for longer than usual. Something's happening and if we don't get there quick enough someone is going to lose their life in the process of all of this."

She nodded waiting for the call about the car to come. "You can't save everyone all the time."

He glanced at her, "But you aim to save the people whether they wish to be saved or not." He replied heading towards the phone he had just finished using. He guessed that there wouldn't be a return phone call in this case.

Matsuda answered on the first ring of the phone. He had been waiting for days for this phone call, "Have you located Matt?" He asked instantly into the silence that spread between the two of them.

"Both Matt and Mello have been located. It seems as if I've underestimated the situation between Matt and Mello. Matt is in immediate danger and has now become the first priority. There will be a car sent for you we're ending this now."

* * *

Misa didn't like the sound of those words. Everything couldn't be coming to an end yet. They still had a few days left, Matt wasn't going to die. She sighed softly watching the worried expression on Matsuda's face as he glanced at her. She gave a reassuring smile suddenly wishing that she wasn't the one caught up in this. She had no place being here. None.

Instead of comforting Matsuda as he spoke to Near she slipped from the room putting her cellphone to her ear. Raito's answer wasn't nearly as quickly as Matsuda's had been. "What is it Misa?" The words were terse as if he was already annoyed she had bothered calling him.

"The end is nearing." She whispered glancing back towards the door that separated her from Matsuda. "Near has found Matt and Mello and it seems like it's already started from what I've heard." She heard the faint laughter on the other side of the phone. "Raito, I don't think we should do this."

"It's too late to go back on anything Misa. Endgame is near. We'll finish this all before it even starts. I'll see you there Misa." He hung the phone up as she stood there staring out into the street silently apologizing.


	25. End game 23 Days later

[Authors note: Well, here it is. The final installment of Enough is Enough. I know some of you have been waiting for this for, well, a very long time but I've finally finished it. By time you reach the end of this some of you will hate me and others won't be able to wait for the sequel which will be posted soon so be looking for it. I believe [not for certain] will be entitled 'Enough of Angels'. I'm not too too sure yet, but I'm pretty sure I like that one. If you want to know what it's going to be about feel free to send me a PM. I'd be happy to discuss. The ending of the chapter has been hinted so many times now. I hope that you enjoyed reading as much as I enjoyed writing it. I promise you this isn't goodbye. Be looking out for it. Not for the final time Read, Review and Enjoy.]

End game. 23 Days later

Mello sat leisurely across the room watching the redhead for the first time in days. Matt had endured systematic torture hour by hour until the blond left him be. It wasn't kindness that made the other stop, no; it was revising his game plan for the next bout the red head was going to have to go through. Admitting that he was Near, which was what the blond wanted, would mean certain death. Refusing to admit to being Near and proclaiming to be himself meant prolonged beatings and eventual death. The whole idea rattled Matt to the core. He had thought many times that he would meet his ends at the hands of the blond but he had never imagined that it would be anything like this. He never imagined that Mello would lose his mind, lock him up and attempt to kill him.

"Mell." He coughed biting back the blood that attempted to flow from his lips. Instead he closed his eyes for several seconds in ensure that he could control his words. Pain sprouted from the very midst of his body and a slip up at this point certainly wouldn't be assisting him. "Mell, do you know who I am?" He asked opening his eyes to lock green on blue with the blond. He couldn't call to the other through the Mafia but maybe if he tried he could find the friend that he had once had so long ago. "Do you remember when I first came to Wammy house? Do you remember that was before Near too, when it was just the two of us." He flashed a smile watching the dark sneer run across the others features. His eyes widened before he feverishly shook his head to clear the red sticky tresses from his eyes. "You remember how I couldn't fit in because I was still in shock and the others looked at it as weakness and started picking on me. They made fun of my hair and my eyes and I cried and cried on the playground."

The blond nodded slowly watching the other still with severe distaste. "I got tired of it and baled you out like I always do. I remember running up and tackling Silver into the mud and daring for the rest of them to try me again. Afterwards I had to keep constant watch on you. I even requested that we shared a room which before us was unheard of at Wammy's."

The red head flashed a smile wincing at the pain that shot through his torso "You remember Christmas when Anne would make us sing all those songs and I would tell you that you'd over do it because you were such a choir boy."

Mello rolled his eyes, "You don't understand…"

"Artistic expression." Matt finished for him quickly. "And then Mr. Wammy would come in dressed as Santa and he'd always bring you chocolate and that's how I learned that you truly like dark chocolate more than the others. And how hours after Mr. Wammy had left we'd sit and study for finals and watch movies to relax because you wouldn't let me touch the games saying that it would ruin the day?" Again the blond nodded slowly. "You remember when Near showed up and beat you for the first time and you threw a huge tantrum and even Anne couldn't stop you. I tackled you in the middle of the hallway and drug you back to the room and made you pray until you were level headed again."

"And every time afterwards." He mumbled softly still watching the other but with confused eyes now.

He nodded attempted to move his bound hands, "You remember when you left Wammy's and joined the Mafia and you forced me to stay behind. You remember it took me years but I found you and I've been here ever since."

"Until you ran off with Matsuda." He hissed watching him with sad eyes. "You left me for Matsuda. I deserved that, I did. I know that I did."

Matt didn't respond to the sentiment. "Mello, who am I?"

"Matt." He replied flippantly before gasping. "Matt. Matty, you're Matty."

The red head nodded slowly, "Please, let me go Mello. Please, I won't run anywhere I just want you to take these ropes off of me and I want to go to sleep." He watched the other look confused, "Remember, I gave the phone back to you. If I wanted to run I would have called Matsuda, I didn't. I gave you the phone back, I won't run anywhere. I promise."

The blond nodded pushing his leather clad form off the floor and moving towards the other. "I'm sorry Matty."He whispered reaching forward to untie the other before pausing at the sound of alarms ringing through the warehouse. He frowned in annoyance before he looked down on the red head his eyes clouded once again before striding out the room without looking back. When the door closed behind the blond he knew for sure that everything was at a loss at this point. There would be no going back.

* * *

Raito's hand lingered lightly over the notebook that would complete his greatest accomplishment in only a few more hours. He wasn't too sure how long it would take simply because Misa hadn't written down a time therefore the default would have to be necessary. The woman had very few uses but when he was able to give her one she would be obedient if nothing else. He was beginning to worry just how much longer that would take also.

Cold eyes grazed over the note before he frowned. He could end her and there was no longer anyone else to stop him. She could simply be caught between things that were to transpire but the more he thought about it the more he believed that it wouldn't be that simplistic. He would just have to allow things to happen on their own and if need be he would have to take care of the blond woman. At least what she wrote would prove to be entertaining even if he couldn't see it up close. As an actress she had a flair for the dramatic and he couldn't blame her for that.

Unfortunately this wasn't a situation that he could kill more than two birds with one stone. He still had to deal with Near unless the man met an accidental end. He smirked, how glorious would that be? He couldn't have that kind of luck, but, then again he was God. Maybe he did.

His phone buzzed softly on the seat next to him. He picked it up before placing it to his ear almost expecting to hear the woman screaming in excitement but instead he heard a sullen shell mumble, "It's about to begin. Near is making his move and then…"

"End game." He replied instantly the smirk unable to hide in his voice. "I know, thank you Misa. Be a good actress and make it believable. Make me proud."

"Of course Raito." She whispered hanging the phone up without another word.

He frowned. She would definitely have to be taken care of, he knew that now. It wouldn't happen just yet but it would soon.

* * *

Near sat back twirling his hair lightly the action figures that usually followed him everywhere that he went gone. He was slightly worried that this wouldn't come out as he had planned. Mello's apparent insanity wasn't the only thing leading him to this answer but also because Mello is and will always be known as an unpredictable bastard. The blond didn't feel anything in halves. If he was mad there was seething rage and a personified personal volcano rocking the entire room and sometimes more than just that. When he was annoyed it bore into you almost as much as it did himself. No, Mello wouldn't be brought down with some strategic planning done by him. He would have to play it all by ear. A scowl appeared on his face, he hated not having a plan.

"Near." Hallie called from the computer monitor. "They've infiltrated the perimeter. It's time."

He nodded moving into the seat that she had previously vacated. He picked up a black walkie talkie pressing the side button. "Matsuda, we're beginning. Are you in place with Misa?"

The reply was short, "Yeah."

He placed it back down breathing in deeply. "Let's finish this Mello."

* * *

Mello couldn't believe that he had almost thought that the squirming mass on his bedroom floor could be his Matt. Though, all those things were moments that Matt and he had shared and some of them no one knew but the two of them. He shook his head slowly; it just meant that Matt had sold him out to Near. He couldn't understand how they had progressed to this point. Whatever it was that wasn't his Matty laying on the floor. He wasn't sure who it was anymore truthfully but he certainly wasn't going to let him out of those ties so he could stab him in the back.

Mello cocked the gun not bothering to glance out the peephole for once. Instead he jerked the door wide open ignoring the alarm that continued to blare in the background. His gun lifted and…there was no one there. He blinked slowly in complete confusion.

"Mello." The voice rang clearly as the blond instantly turned the gun downward at the computer that sat alone with a Gothic N flashing. "It's over Mello. Give it up, you knew that when I found you. Just let me take you in and maintain your dignity."

The blond sneered, "What makes you think that I'd let you take me in Near?" He hissed the gun slowly dropping to his side. "This has nothing to do with you. That's just like you, always sticking your nose where it doesn't belong. Stay the fuck out of my business."

Near was silent for a few seconds before replying, "You should know by now Mello I'm here to correct your mistakes. All of them, from the ones between you and Matt to the people you've managed to hurt over the years. Unfortunately those circles overlap now."

"Are you saying that I hurt Matty? I don't do anything to him that…" He paused his eyes hardening faintly hearing the sound of scratching down the hallway. He took aim and fired at the computer before turning in a swift movement and closing the door with his foot. "Matt!" He hissed down the hallway taking a step forward.

* * *

Matsuda never imagined how hard it would be to slip through a window especially with Misa mumbling behind him the whole time. This had been Near's ingenious plan all along, to distract Mello long enough for him to be able to slip in and get Matt out. Whatever happened to him at that point didn't matter as long as the red head was in the safety of being away from the volatile blond.

He remembered the conversation he had just a few days prior with Near.

_"Mello's currently keeping Matt hostage in a warehouse. I've found the location with ease but how we're to get in and get out without Mello being alerted is a different story." His voice sounded tired for the first time since they had been in contact. "Mello is a very explosive person and I'm worried that his sanity has been threatened to the point where he will attempt to take everyone out with himself. In my phone conversation it seemed as if…" He stopped._

_Matsuda frowned, he didn't care what Mello had seemed like in their conversation as long as Matt was still alive and well. "Is Matt alright?" _

_"I can't answer that any more than you can. I believe I heard him in the background before the sounds of a struggle. Then again, telephones can be misleading so maybe there was simply static. It's more important that we access Mello's mental stability before we attempt anything. Mello is fully capable of taking out a whole battalion if need be. I won't send my men to a useless death. There's no use in sacrificing a life to save a life." _

_Matsuda glared into the phone, "Are you saying that Matt could be dead?" _

_"Possibly but I doubt it. If Matt still looks like Matt despite Mello inwardly believing that Matt is me he wouldn't kill him." _

_Matsuda frowned, "Why can't we just send in people and take him out easily." _

_"Mello is a genius. Insane or not he's waiting for me to make a move somehow, somewhere. He knows that I'm coming and he waiting for me. Sending in my men would only mean that I'm sending them in for a painful death on my behalf. That's not how I work. You don't kill the many for the few despite what you may want to believe. On the other hand he's easily distracted and his coddled superiority complex will give us the advantage as long as you can get in and get out. _

_He nodded to himself, "I can do it. Even if I can't get out Matt will definitely make it out of this." _

_Near had to applaud his perseverance._

Matsuda gasped stepping firmly on something that shifted in the floor. He highly doubted that Mello would have some kind of animal here. He moved slightly falling to the floor beside the window and crouching down.

"Da fuck…" He heard a familiar voice whisper before hacking something terrible.

Matsuda sprang pulling the red head into his arms breathing in a sigh of relief. "Matty. Matty, you're alive." He whispered feeling wetness running down the others face. He pulled back squinting heavily in the dimness of the warehouse before frowning. Blood dropped lightly from the side of Matt's mouth and a bit from the side of his head. His eyes widened, that hacking was coming from the red head. "We're going to get you out of here Matt." He whispered patting at his pockets before pulling out a small knife and beginning on the ropes that bound the other. "I promise, we'll go somewhere quiet and you'll never have to deal with this again."

Matt laughed softly, "I killed someone Touta. Accidentally but I still did it. I couldn't go back with you."

The whisper of the knife on the rope was louder than Matsuda had initially expected. The sound forced a determined scowl on his features, "Do you know where Mello is right now?"

"Right here." The voice from the door rang in a sweet sing song. "Pleasure to see you here working with Near Touta Matsuda." Mello leaned against the door frame watching the two with dark eyes. "I should have known you'd sell my out Matt. I should have known from the very beginning but I allowed myself to become close to you. To love you and allow you to understand me." He shook his head slowly the gun shifting nervously in his hand. "I never thought it would have to come to this Matt but I know you're not my Matt anymore. You haven't been my Matt for years, right?"

Matt shook his head glancing at Matsuda. "Mello, I keep telling you I'm right here."

Mello aimed the gun raising an eyebrow. "The only thing I see in front of me is a puppet of Near and a dead man. I'll give you a choice on which is which."

* * *

"Hallie." The white haired boy whispered moving from his chair leaving the walkie talkie. "We're going in, I need you to cover me." He slid past the woman barely waiting for the two associates at the door to open it for him. He dropped from van before sliding the pale carnival mask over his face. Never can be too safe, even if you were walking into a situation with a gun wielding insane person.

The blond woman dropped from the van behind him gun already drawn. "Near, what's happening?"

He edged around the side of the building before taking on the stairs. "I knew that I could only occupy Mello for a short amount of time simply because he's easily irritated by my. Our rivalry will probably transcend time but I didn't take into account that he could still hear within his own home with the alarm. He figured I was distracting him and shot the computer. He doesn't think that I'm here but hiding somewhere from him."

The boy stopped at the obliterated computer glancing back at Hallie who nodded. He took a firm step back before she braced herself kicking the door in. It fell with ease as she held a hand back. "Let me check everything out before you come in Near."

He shook his head brushing past her, "Mello isn't in this room. He's with Matt. If we find Matt, we'll find Mello."

* * *

Mello smirked faintly hearing the sound of a door being kicked in. He sighed, he had planned for all of this but he figured that it would be more fun to allow everything to unfold on its own. "Who's coming Matsuda?" He asked clearly refusing to look behind him his gun still trained firmly on Matt's head.

Matsuda shrugged keeping a firm hand on Matt's shoulder. "If you love him then why would you aim a gun at him?"

Mello rolled his eyes, "The Matt I loved is long gone by now. You know that don't you, _Matty_?"

The red head gasped hacking more blood into the fine wooden floor. Matsuda jumped moving to turn the other before Mello grunted and shook his head. "Then what, should we let him choke off his own blood?"

He shrugged lightly, "Maybe. Why not?"

"Mello!" The nearly whispered voice came from behind the blond. "Mello, it's over. I have men surrounding this whole building and Hallie has a gun trained on you. You can't win this. Just give up and come with me."

The blond perked, "Oh goodie, now Near's showed up to give more of his orders!" He turned slightly to be able to survey the new entries. "Now Near, you should know me better than that. I won't give up until I finish what it is that I've started."

The white haired boy shook his head. "Hallie is under the orders to shoot to kill if you make any suspicious movements."

Mello sniggered, "You want me to test it?" He questioned taking a firm step forward shifting the aim of his gun from Matt towards the occupied Matsuda. The dark haired man worked desperately to get the restraints off of the red haired man.

Matt breathed a sigh of relief slowly pulling himself to his feet. "Mello." He seethed barely noticing the blood that dripped from his lips. "Stop this Mello. If you want to kill us both then get to it but I won't let you hurt anyone else in this room. These people are innocent. All of them." He took a heavy step forward as the gaze of the blonds gun changed to him again.

"Stay away from me Matt. If you know what's good for you, you'll stay away from me." Mello's voice was icy cold at this point.

Matt sniggered in a slick imitation of Mello himself, "Why would I do that? Isn't this what you wanted Mello? For us to be together? For us to die together? To burn together in the depths that you always talked about?" He stepped forward again and again and again. "If you want to go with me then pull the fucking trigger Mello! Do it!" He was now face to face with the blond whose eyes narrowed squarely.

"Near." Hallie's voice whispered glancing at the white haired boy who simply stared. "I can take him. We can end this."

Hesitation flashed through the boy's features before the slight nod came.

Hallie's stance shifted as she fired firmly into the blond who looked momentarily stunned by both Matt's actions and the bullet into his back. A second shot resounded the room and then another and another. Hallie stood shaking her head firmly as she strolled to Near's side and patted him on the shoulder. "I didn't kill him."

He glanced up at the woman before looking away. "It wouldn't have mattered if you did."

Mello's eyes were wide and shocked for the first time since entering as he stared at the cold eyes of Matt. "Matty." He whispered softly dropping the gun in his hands still bracing himself against the pain racking his shoulder and leg. He couldn't move, as much as his body wanted to drop he couldn't move. "Matty. Matty? Oh God…"

Matsuda didn't move a look of shocked horror on his face before an animalistic scream ran from his lips. "Matt!" He screamed barely registering Near saying anything from across the room.

Mello dropped Matt's body falling with his own as he cradled the red head in his arms. "What have…What…" He whispered over and over brushing hair aside to find Matt's eyes still staring. He gasped, a tear escaping from his eye.

"How many times did you shoot Hallie?" He whispered looking paler than ever.

"Twice."

* * *

The car door opened slightly before Misa slipped in closing it firmly. "Everything is complete." She said picking up the death note and laying it firmly on her lap. "Twenty three days." She whispered.

The car started before pulling off. Raito spared a glance watching the warehouse stormed.

[Welcome to the end of Enough is Enough. Well I told some of you that you would hate me. I remember dreaming up this ending over a year ago and I've finally completed it. I don't think that a story like this would have had a particularly happy ending. The next installment will be interesting but DON'T think it will be Matt free because it won't. With love Mrs. Mail Jeevas.


End file.
